...
I never finished this?
Well, better late then never right?
~
Day 7 - Time unknown
I hated the overhead intercom. It always woke me up entirely too early, and it never had anything good or positive to relay. Except, when it woke me up this morning, It was the most glorious annoying alarm I had ever been woken up by. The muffled voice called out my name. You have no idea how happy and confused I was at the same time. After a couple of prodding questions, I learned what I wanted to hear. i wasn't getting moved anymore. I was getting out!
Hallelujah!
I was shaking with just about every nerve in my body. The endless torement and depressing atmosphere was just about over. I had to check, doucle check, and even triple check that this was actually happening. Kevin, who was the inmate who was sleeping above me, was somewhat happy and sad to see me go. He was the closest thing I'd call a friend in this joint, so we said some farewells and I'm pretty sure he was the only person I actually shook their hand. He was someone I could relate to, and in the end, the only thing I could do to show any sign of compassion to his cause was to give him the bottom bunk. He gladly accepted. Shame I never knew what happened to him, hope he got out more early then later.
So once again I packed up all my things and set off to the front of the holding area. I got heckled by pretty much all the goons I walked by, some calling me Bucs Bonus, some just calling me fag. I pretty much didn't even hear anything anymore. I was shocked that it was all wrapping up and over. Well just about.
They checked my ID badge and opened the let me out. I relinquished all of my items once again, only this time for good! Bye bye matress, bye linens and things, bye crappy toothbrush, bye bye crazy lunatics, hello freedom!
I did it. Whatever it is, it had been done! I reeked something fierce, but my plan to have no close encounters was a successful one. My anus was safe once again. It felt good to unclench it. No, really, all jokes aside that was what I was most fearful of while in this place. I guess rape isn't that funny after all. heh
They made me wait, what seemed like an hour at the front entrance of the building. They didn't really say anything to me. Well, no. That's a lie. One of the guards actually asked me something. he said somethign along the lines of, "Are you excited?"
What kind of stupid shit... I hate these people. Comedians all around me.
One other person who was holed up in a different room came out. Looks like we were the two lucky ones. We exchanged a nod which said more then I can decribe to you in just a couple of words. It was like we were getting out of a beautiful struggle.
It was nothing new to these guys, but I wanted them to speed this crap up. They were taking their sweet time with it all. I'm sure they had to wait for checks and signals, or whatever protocol they followed in this joint, but even in their release methods they string you out and make you wait. It's gawd damn torture, and I know they do it on purpose. I now know what a dog feels like when you put food in their dish, but order them not to eat it.
The gaurds got the paperwork all settled out and me and this black dude were escorted out and walked to some other building. Truth be told this compound was confusing as hell. Nothing ever looked the same, even though I'm sure I was just retracing my steps only backwards towards the entrance. In any case, we picked up some other guys who were getting released as well and all of us (five total) all hoped into the back of one of those transport vans. the funny thing of it all was they had cages in the van and locked us in the back of it. Why? we were all gettig out of jail, why the hell would we cause a scene or try to escape from the people who are escorting us to our freedom? Whatever, silly jailhouse rules I suppose.
The maze of buildings led us past gates and guards alike. We stopped at about three closed off sections, while the driver exchanged paperwork and mingled with friends before we finally arrived at the big building which looked somewhat familiar. I assumed we had arrived back at the place where they have the initial holding area. Ladies and gentlement we have come full circle and arrived at the begining of it all.
More security stop and ID checks and more guards freeloading talking to friends while the group of us just waited for them to carry on with our release methods. I just wanted to say, "Hey, you can go ahead and chatter like a couple of gossip hens, I'll find my own way out." ... Oh, if only.
I was basically a mute during this entire time. The other guys were all making snide remarks towards the guards, but I just smiled out of courtesy. Joking is fine, but who knows what is cause for them to terminate your early release and what not. I wasn't going to find out. All I knew was that we were getting closer to me getting the hell out of here.
We walked through more security areas and had our paperwork checked again. I swear, what do these guys think about their inmates? that some of them are Houdini and can find a way to get a body double during all these checks and scans? It is really annoying having them grab your wrist and look to see if you are actually you for the fifth time in an hour. Can we speed this process up please?
The guards takes all the paperwork we were carrying around and gives it to a clerk behind some glass window. This could only mean that things were wrapping up. After a short 30 minute delay we were escorted into a waiting room. Now, this was something I was familiar with. The end of the end. It was almost time to get out of these smelly ass clothes! I had completely forgotten what I even came into this place wearing.
We all get in this small ass room and again, after a considerable amount of waiting we start getting called one at a time to the attendent at the window. Of course a guard is in the room with us, and we sign a waiver and the lady gives each of us our clothes and/or items back. Naturally this is jail, so there is no privacy, so we have to strip naked in this room in front of strangers and put on our other clothes on. Fun. It wasn't any fun stripping down in front of strangers during my days as a wrestler and it still isn't any fun. At this point of this whole ordeal, shame had been a word long forgotten, so off went my clothes without as much as a second thought.
It felt good to get out of that orange jump suit. My regular clothes were liberating. Jeans and my own pair of boxers! I instantly turned on my phone to see if I had any battery power left, whcih I did. I also noticed that it was just under five o'clock in the morning. I am not sure when I woke up today, but I assume it was just before breakfast or during it. Who cares right?
There was no reception in this area, so I had to wait until I was completely out before I could call someone to come pick me up. The only person I could count on, was my brother.
I waited my turn and finally after what seemed like hours of waiting, my ordeal had finished. They led me to a room that was like the last security stop before freedom. I signed some more paperwork, the receptionist said some sort of congratulatory statement which I scoffed off, and pointed me towards a door. They close you off in this room with nothing in it other then the door you walked in though and the other door across from it. Then they make you wait there for a stupidly long time. You get the clearing, you hear a click, the door unlocks and...
You see the beginings of the sun brightening the dark skies, dispelling the night. Calling forth a bright new day. I was back in the delivery room where familes come to pick up their loved ones. No one was waiting for me. I smiled.
I took a seat at one of the chairs and called my brother. Now, I think I mentioned that I was mad at him, that it was his fault I got in this mess in the first place, but none of that mattered now. The phone rang and rang. It was early, who knows if he would answer, but to his credit he did and sounded surely surprised.
"You're out already?"
Hells yes I'm out asshole, come get me. GET ME GET ME GET MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!
...or what I really said, "Yeah." He responded that he was getting up and was going to pick me up. it was about an hour drive from his house, so what could I do while I waited...
That's right! If you forgot I had brought my gameboy advanced with me and it was nice and safe in the cops holding area along with all my other junk. I guess it did have its purpose. Pokemon was what I had brought with me, so I spent the dwindling hour surfing and fighting water types with a Jolteon or something. Gawd damn it felt good to play a video game again!
I WAS FREE!!!!!!
When my brother got there we shared a tender loving moment, exchange a hug. I love my brother, despite his faults and all. Life is too short and crazy to waste having ill feelings towards anyone, especially if they are family. Because those assholes you are going to have to deal with for the rest fo your life!
As we walked back to my car, we talked about bull shit. He had waited to see the Dark Knight which was awesome. i was so ready to go and watch that, but first...
I wanted food. We went to Burger King and I ate the most delicious Whooper that had ever graced a fast food grill. I did my scar special and put the fries into the burger, honestly why doesn't this just come naturally? I just want you all to know how amazing this food was compared to the trash I had been filling my stomach with for the past week.
We stopped by his house and for the first time in a week I took a shower. I do beleieve this had been the longest time I had ever spent without showering, so i took a couple of baths. I spent about an hour in the shower just sitting under the hot water laughing, reapplying soap and shampoo every now and then for the hell of it.
The rest of the day was a wash. I watched the Dark Knight which was amazing (Like you all didn't know that already, heh.) and had to explain to my mother that my phone didn;t get reception out at the camping site we were at. She was a little worried about me, but I gave her a kiss and a hug and told her that I was fine and she let it go after awhile. I ended the day by literally throwing myself onto my bed and getting the best sleep of my life. I just hope this whole experience made me grow, if only just a little.
Day 7 was over. Dread Quest 8 - Journey of the Cursed Cuban was complete!
~~
Somehow I had fooled my own parents and even my job into thinking I was just away from society on a trip or mourning a death in my family. Hahahaha
What a crazy adventure, lets never do that again!
Saturday, July 16, 2011
Day 6
er, I need to finish this...if I even remember everything anymore...
Day 6 - Tuesday
4:00 am
Bottom bunk was amazing. As amazing a bed could be in a prison that is. I had the bitch fully tented so when the lights hit for breakfast I was still uncomfortably asleep. Thankfully the loud overhead speaker got me out of my dream phaze long enough to notice it was time to eat. This cell block area thing served breakfast at 4, an hour later then the last hole I was in. Yay? Who cares right.
Me, and my four short term friends all sat together. There was the fight-proned crackhead who was ever proud of his latest skirmishes within the walls. The Thief who slept above me. The dealer who only talked about msuic and the fact of that he couldn't wait to get out so he could keep selling. And then there was one of the guys who transfered to this block with me. He was quiet, I don't think I ever asked him what he did to get in here, but he looked to be the quickly agitated kind. Most fo these men sported tatoos of some kind. I felt supremely out of place. (and rigthfully so)
At least they were easy to talk to. I also bummed off some of there contraband. Mooching in prison of all places. Old habits die hard I guess. Not like I was ever goign to see these people again. might as well use them for whatever I could get out of them. I only had a couple more days left in this place.
Doing the math was fun. I was already over the halfway point by now. This being Tuesday, I had just around 100 hours left in this filth box. This of course was just accounting for my initial sentence of ten days, minus the one day I had of time served already. I figured I'd be out of this place by sometime Friday at worst.
The food was unmemorable, as usual. Breakfast came and went and I was back in my cave before I knew it. All the chatter in the world wasn't going to stop me from my slumber. Did I mention this bed was like ten times more comfortable then my last hard, stiff mess? Anyways, off to sleep I went.
10:00 am
Lunch. More of the same. Me and those other guys stuck together, talked crap about stuff from the outside world, and ate some less then deseriable food and went back to our tiny room of entrapment. Back in our humble abode, we were greeted with some new faces. That meant that some people were leaving. The thief and crackhead left and were replaced by some black guy and this huge italian looking dude named Kevin. Kevin slept above me, he was like twice my size. If he wanted he could have moved me out of my bottom bunk by force, but thankfully the dude was saint-like. The dealer was gone too. It seemed he left while we were all sleeping. Something about him requesting a job and working all day long. It was all good, more deoderant for me!
Sitting around after lunch me and Kevin started to talk. This guy was a sweetheart, he didn't look like he belonged here either. I learned that he had lost everything because of his ex-girlfriend calling the cops on him at his own house after her ex tried to break into Kevin's house and he retaliated. What a great system, eh? Like I mentioned, he had lost everything. She had sold all his stuff when he was taken away. He lost his job, and literally had nothing to his name. His story made me sick.
in any case, he was a big computer nerd and he loaned me his gamer magazine. A couple months old, but it still helped the time pass.
Brawl had just come out in this edition. Yay! Me and Kevin talked about that series for a good while too. I so wanted to play him and test my abilities against him, against anyone. I missed video games. I missed just about everything.
Game time! Played spades and ocne again dominated. Caught some fools renigging as well. ATTENTION: I Now know where puerto-ricans come from. i was playing against this 18 year old dude. He was 95% mexican and 5% indian. He had two kids and was serving six months in here for something. Also, he seemed proud of it as well. Amazing.
I got mixed up with some conspiracy theories as well while I was in here. While we were watching the news, there was a topic about the on going war. Seeing this, one of the inmates scared the living hell out of me. He said that if anyone were to ever invade US soil, that prisons are to immediately execute every inmate held in captivity. I am not sure if this is true or not, but ebing inside the joint when soemone tells you this is not a fun feeling. I wanted out desperately.
Religion was a big topic, for obvious reasons. Men who had no where else to turn, who were spending a good amount of their adult life imprisoned, who needed that calling, that acceptance, that feeling that even after all their fuck ups, that someone would still forgive them, they turned to the bible and to Jesus and his teachings. It's easily understandable. There was someone I felt bad for in here, though I can not remember his name. He was a drug addict who had brain damage from something, but he always kept a bible close at hand. When i talked to him, he didn't even fully understand what he was reading, but he knew that the words spoken to him had meaning. He just couldn't comprehend them. He was a nice enough guy, though he was the bud of everyones jokes at the expense of his own density.
This was just like high school.
4:00 pm
Dinner. If I remember correctly, this was a good meal...compared to all the slop they had fed us earlier. Then again, even by those standards, nothing to write home about.
Home.
I missed my mom. I know she was worried about me. It had been five days since I last talked to her. I wondered how good my camping cover up would work with her. I wondered what all my friends were doing. I thought about a lot of things. Did anyone miss me? Did anyone that knew where I was care enough to stop their daily routines and worry about my well being? Was I just a non factor to everyone around me for those days? Was there anyone out there thinking about me at that very second? I couldn't think of anyone off the top of my head. I was depressed and alone, surrounded by some of the worst humans, or some of the unluckiest ones. I would have to classify myself as being one of the unlucky ones. Someone who was wrongfully accused, someone who the system could use in their money making scheme. Someone who would become part of their system.
A slave.
(I later learned when I was out that my friend Steven was going to visit me, but that I got out before he was going to come. That actually made me feel a lot better...afterwards. Ha.)
Then there was a light in the darkness. One of the toothless inmates heard us talking and joined in our discussions. He asked me what I was in for and for how long. When I told him and told him how long I had already been in, he gave me a little nugget of blessed information. He said that if I was given ten days, that the prison has a system of good behavior. That I would have two days shaved off my sentence including the one day of good behavior. That changed everything. If he was right, that meant I would be out of there by Wednesday...Tomorrow!
Of course I asked around about this finding. Most the people said he was wrong, other said i would only get the one day of time served off, other said different things. since no one could agree on any onerumor, I didn't bank on the man's words. If I heard my name tomorrow then, yeah, I'd be extatic. If not then I would have to wait my turn like the rest of us in here. Us? Ugh, that thought sickened me. Sometimes I felt like I would never get out of this place.
I had no idea what time it was, but it was getting dark out which meant one thing. The end of another sluggish, long day. Thing was, I wasn't tired, not in the slightest. Truth be told I was anxious. That news of me maybe getting out tomorrow had me antsy. I was wired and I wasn't even drinking any of the (assumingly) nasty coffee that was being whored around.
I saw a Playboy being passed around. What the hell right? I wasn't going to whip my dick out and start jerking it, but hell, naked women beat the hell out of anything in here. i walked up to the dude who had it and asked if I could look through it. He said sure, and I took it back to my little cave.
great success!
Just my luck too! it was Wonder Women on the cover. How could I resist? I'm such a nerd. Of course I want to see her naked! I opened it up and was thoroughly dissapointed. All the pictures were cut out of the magazine. This place was hell. Was there anything in here worth a damn?
It's prison, what kind of question was that?
It had happened before, but I had to use the bathroom. I tried to find a good time when no one was in the place and made my move. The other cell I was in had just one toilet so there was somewhat of a privacy measure to be had. In this place there was just three toilets all next to each other and across from them were three urinals. My luck, empty room. I had been saving this one for awhile.
Let's not go overboard, but this was a good shit. Alone, quiet (for the most part), and much needed. one person did try to come into the bathroom while I was in there, but I think the smell detered him and he quickly retreated. Mission accomplished.
The night progress regularly enough. I played some risk with what looked to be war vets who took the game too serious. (I could never defend Kumchatka as well as ravi ever did.) I also built (put together?) a puzzle... What? Doing puzzles is a normal thing...in prison. What else did I have to do, besides that took a lot of time, plus the conversations around the puzzle square was entertaining enough. The white boy who was being made fun of last night told me he turned 19 in prison. How lovely! What a way to spend your birthday. Although my last two days of birth hadn't been too much better. He also told me that right when he was getting out that his girl was waiting, and that he was getting "mad pussy." Must be nice.
Later on at night I noticed a bunch of people in what seemed to be a line of some sorts forming outside the bathroom. Me being the curious sort, I decided to take a peak.
Workout time! The inmates had made a weight room of sorts in the bathroom. It felt like I was in one of those old prison flicks. This was the set up: They had an old mop handle, a pillow case, a plastic bag and a lot of water. What they did was fill up the plastic bag with water, tie that up, put that in the pillow case, tie the pillow case to the middle of the mop stick and voila, curling bar. I waited my turn and did a couple of sets. I could see how if I had stayed here longer I could have gotten relatively large, but in the end I only did this one night. It was fun though, everyone was in a joking mannor. most of the people working out even corrected me when I went and curled, they showed me the "proper" way to curl a pillow sack filled with water.
When I got my workout fix, I left the gym. I was exhausted, but not tired. I laid down in my bed and just stared at the top of my bunk. It felt like a lifetime of oppurtunity was slipping through my fingers while I was in here. I was going nowhere in school. I was striking out with every girl I tried to build a relationship with. I was working at two dead end jobs. And to top it all off, I was in prison. I needed to change things around, but that would prove to be harder then just thinking about it.
I fell into a quiet slumber thinking heavily about my future. Hopefully this would be the last time I ever had to go through this experience. If anything it made me stronger.
Even if I initially didn't notice.
Day 6 was over.
Day 6 - Tuesday
4:00 am
Bottom bunk was amazing. As amazing a bed could be in a prison that is. I had the bitch fully tented so when the lights hit for breakfast I was still uncomfortably asleep. Thankfully the loud overhead speaker got me out of my dream phaze long enough to notice it was time to eat. This cell block area thing served breakfast at 4, an hour later then the last hole I was in. Yay? Who cares right.
Me, and my four short term friends all sat together. There was the fight-proned crackhead who was ever proud of his latest skirmishes within the walls. The Thief who slept above me. The dealer who only talked about msuic and the fact of that he couldn't wait to get out so he could keep selling. And then there was one of the guys who transfered to this block with me. He was quiet, I don't think I ever asked him what he did to get in here, but he looked to be the quickly agitated kind. Most fo these men sported tatoos of some kind. I felt supremely out of place. (and rigthfully so)
At least they were easy to talk to. I also bummed off some of there contraband. Mooching in prison of all places. Old habits die hard I guess. Not like I was ever goign to see these people again. might as well use them for whatever I could get out of them. I only had a couple more days left in this place.
Doing the math was fun. I was already over the halfway point by now. This being Tuesday, I had just around 100 hours left in this filth box. This of course was just accounting for my initial sentence of ten days, minus the one day I had of time served already. I figured I'd be out of this place by sometime Friday at worst.
The food was unmemorable, as usual. Breakfast came and went and I was back in my cave before I knew it. All the chatter in the world wasn't going to stop me from my slumber. Did I mention this bed was like ten times more comfortable then my last hard, stiff mess? Anyways, off to sleep I went.
10:00 am
Lunch. More of the same. Me and those other guys stuck together, talked crap about stuff from the outside world, and ate some less then deseriable food and went back to our tiny room of entrapment. Back in our humble abode, we were greeted with some new faces. That meant that some people were leaving. The thief and crackhead left and were replaced by some black guy and this huge italian looking dude named Kevin. Kevin slept above me, he was like twice my size. If he wanted he could have moved me out of my bottom bunk by force, but thankfully the dude was saint-like. The dealer was gone too. It seemed he left while we were all sleeping. Something about him requesting a job and working all day long. It was all good, more deoderant for me!
Sitting around after lunch me and Kevin started to talk. This guy was a sweetheart, he didn't look like he belonged here either. I learned that he had lost everything because of his ex-girlfriend calling the cops on him at his own house after her ex tried to break into Kevin's house and he retaliated. What a great system, eh? Like I mentioned, he had lost everything. She had sold all his stuff when he was taken away. He lost his job, and literally had nothing to his name. His story made me sick.
in any case, he was a big computer nerd and he loaned me his gamer magazine. A couple months old, but it still helped the time pass.
Brawl had just come out in this edition. Yay! Me and Kevin talked about that series for a good while too. I so wanted to play him and test my abilities against him, against anyone. I missed video games. I missed just about everything.
Game time! Played spades and ocne again dominated. Caught some fools renigging as well. ATTENTION: I Now know where puerto-ricans come from. i was playing against this 18 year old dude. He was 95% mexican and 5% indian. He had two kids and was serving six months in here for something. Also, he seemed proud of it as well. Amazing.
I got mixed up with some conspiracy theories as well while I was in here. While we were watching the news, there was a topic about the on going war. Seeing this, one of the inmates scared the living hell out of me. He said that if anyone were to ever invade US soil, that prisons are to immediately execute every inmate held in captivity. I am not sure if this is true or not, but ebing inside the joint when soemone tells you this is not a fun feeling. I wanted out desperately.
Religion was a big topic, for obvious reasons. Men who had no where else to turn, who were spending a good amount of their adult life imprisoned, who needed that calling, that acceptance, that feeling that even after all their fuck ups, that someone would still forgive them, they turned to the bible and to Jesus and his teachings. It's easily understandable. There was someone I felt bad for in here, though I can not remember his name. He was a drug addict who had brain damage from something, but he always kept a bible close at hand. When i talked to him, he didn't even fully understand what he was reading, but he knew that the words spoken to him had meaning. He just couldn't comprehend them. He was a nice enough guy, though he was the bud of everyones jokes at the expense of his own density.
This was just like high school.
4:00 pm
Dinner. If I remember correctly, this was a good meal...compared to all the slop they had fed us earlier. Then again, even by those standards, nothing to write home about.
Home.
I missed my mom. I know she was worried about me. It had been five days since I last talked to her. I wondered how good my camping cover up would work with her. I wondered what all my friends were doing. I thought about a lot of things. Did anyone miss me? Did anyone that knew where I was care enough to stop their daily routines and worry about my well being? Was I just a non factor to everyone around me for those days? Was there anyone out there thinking about me at that very second? I couldn't think of anyone off the top of my head. I was depressed and alone, surrounded by some of the worst humans, or some of the unluckiest ones. I would have to classify myself as being one of the unlucky ones. Someone who was wrongfully accused, someone who the system could use in their money making scheme. Someone who would become part of their system.
A slave.
(I later learned when I was out that my friend Steven was going to visit me, but that I got out before he was going to come. That actually made me feel a lot better...afterwards. Ha.)
Then there was a light in the darkness. One of the toothless inmates heard us talking and joined in our discussions. He asked me what I was in for and for how long. When I told him and told him how long I had already been in, he gave me a little nugget of blessed information. He said that if I was given ten days, that the prison has a system of good behavior. That I would have two days shaved off my sentence including the one day of good behavior. That changed everything. If he was right, that meant I would be out of there by Wednesday...Tomorrow!
Of course I asked around about this finding. Most the people said he was wrong, other said i would only get the one day of time served off, other said different things. since no one could agree on any onerumor, I didn't bank on the man's words. If I heard my name tomorrow then, yeah, I'd be extatic. If not then I would have to wait my turn like the rest of us in here. Us? Ugh, that thought sickened me. Sometimes I felt like I would never get out of this place.
I had no idea what time it was, but it was getting dark out which meant one thing. The end of another sluggish, long day. Thing was, I wasn't tired, not in the slightest. Truth be told I was anxious. That news of me maybe getting out tomorrow had me antsy. I was wired and I wasn't even drinking any of the (assumingly) nasty coffee that was being whored around.
I saw a Playboy being passed around. What the hell right? I wasn't going to whip my dick out and start jerking it, but hell, naked women beat the hell out of anything in here. i walked up to the dude who had it and asked if I could look through it. He said sure, and I took it back to my little cave.
great success!
Just my luck too! it was Wonder Women on the cover. How could I resist? I'm such a nerd. Of course I want to see her naked! I opened it up and was thoroughly dissapointed. All the pictures were cut out of the magazine. This place was hell. Was there anything in here worth a damn?
It's prison, what kind of question was that?
It had happened before, but I had to use the bathroom. I tried to find a good time when no one was in the place and made my move. The other cell I was in had just one toilet so there was somewhat of a privacy measure to be had. In this place there was just three toilets all next to each other and across from them were three urinals. My luck, empty room. I had been saving this one for awhile.
Let's not go overboard, but this was a good shit. Alone, quiet (for the most part), and much needed. one person did try to come into the bathroom while I was in there, but I think the smell detered him and he quickly retreated. Mission accomplished.
The night progress regularly enough. I played some risk with what looked to be war vets who took the game too serious. (I could never defend Kumchatka as well as ravi ever did.) I also built (put together?) a puzzle... What? Doing puzzles is a normal thing...in prison. What else did I have to do, besides that took a lot of time, plus the conversations around the puzzle square was entertaining enough. The white boy who was being made fun of last night told me he turned 19 in prison. How lovely! What a way to spend your birthday. Although my last two days of birth hadn't been too much better. He also told me that right when he was getting out that his girl was waiting, and that he was getting "mad pussy." Must be nice.
Later on at night I noticed a bunch of people in what seemed to be a line of some sorts forming outside the bathroom. Me being the curious sort, I decided to take a peak.
Workout time! The inmates had made a weight room of sorts in the bathroom. It felt like I was in one of those old prison flicks. This was the set up: They had an old mop handle, a pillow case, a plastic bag and a lot of water. What they did was fill up the plastic bag with water, tie that up, put that in the pillow case, tie the pillow case to the middle of the mop stick and voila, curling bar. I waited my turn and did a couple of sets. I could see how if I had stayed here longer I could have gotten relatively large, but in the end I only did this one night. It was fun though, everyone was in a joking mannor. most of the people working out even corrected me when I went and curled, they showed me the "proper" way to curl a pillow sack filled with water.
When I got my workout fix, I left the gym. I was exhausted, but not tired. I laid down in my bed and just stared at the top of my bunk. It felt like a lifetime of oppurtunity was slipping through my fingers while I was in here. I was going nowhere in school. I was striking out with every girl I tried to build a relationship with. I was working at two dead end jobs. And to top it all off, I was in prison. I needed to change things around, but that would prove to be harder then just thinking about it.
I fell into a quiet slumber thinking heavily about my future. Hopefully this would be the last time I ever had to go through this experience. If anything it made me stronger.
Even if I initially didn't notice.
Day 6 was over.
Day 5
Day 5 - Monday
3:00 am
Breakfast again. The only thing special about this meal was that Tyrone was acting nervous. I felt the need to ask what the deal was. he told me that he had been in this place for thirty-something odd days and still hadn't seen a judge. He said that if he didn't see a judge soon (like around 40 days in) and get a sentence that they would have to release him. I found it funny that they would keep anyone in here for that long of a stint without seeing a judge. It seemed that he was close to getting released if they didn't send him away, thus his nervousness.
In any case, I just thought of the what-if scenario of me being in here for that long. I guess I would be itching to not see a judge too. However, sleep was more important to me at the moment. I said a little prayer for a bunch of things and fell to sleep again.
Noise. I have no idea what time it is, but I am woken up by one of the intercoms blasting my name in our block. I heard some of the inmates calling me out by my nickname. I had no idea what was going on. I looked down to question my two cellmates, but both Tyrone and Tony were gone. I guess Tyrone didn't escape the judges wrath, poor soul.
I asked a wandering fellow what was going on, he said something that blew my mind. "Your going home Cliff."
I had to rub my eyes. I didn't question anything, I just picked up all my junk (mat, pillow, razor, etc.) and ran downstairs. The cop by the cell door took a look at my badge and let me out. I stood in the middle of the multi-roomed cell and took a deep breath. Was I going home so early?
I waited there for what seemed like eternity. Apparently I wasn't the only one leaving, they started calling other peoples names and before I knew it there was like seven or so people out in the hall standing around like idiots. Thankfully I didn't have to carry all my junk, the made me toss all that stuff in some bin. I was back to the bear minimums, what I came into this place with. Everyone else had bags of candy and other things they had collected. Who cared about that crap, we were getting released!
Or so I thought at the time. Rather, that was what I was hoping. Little did I know that all this waiting around just meant I was being transferred. I guess they don't keep anyone in the same spot for a long time for a reason. This process of moving us around took at least two hours. Most of us got separated into different areas of the jail. not that I knew any of these people. It was just a long period of awkward silence.
Warning: Celebrity Sighting! That's right, I saw someone of certain status in this joint! The one, the only Nick Hogan. Ok, who really cares about Nick Hogan, but I found it funny that I was in the same jail that he was serving in for that stupid shit he did. I saw him when I was being transferred into my new area. I didn't talk to him, I just passed by. I think he was working or something, seemed busy.
Moving on.
My new place of rest. It was a building of some sort. Reminded me of a summer camp style bunking area. It was like a huge one story house. Instead of having mini semi-rooms, this place just had one big wide open area with bunk beds in every corner. The room I went to had to be right out of a boys N the hood sketch. Negros overfilled this place, most of the other folk in here, if they were white or anything else were old and scrawny. The blacks most definitely controlled this area. I don't want to say I was afraid of them; let's just say one of them was wearing a damn eye patch. Really?
Since this place was more closed off, and only had one story the noise was amplified to the tenth power. And here I thought the other place was a tad loud. I found an empty bunk in one of the end corners, top of course. At least this mat I picked up was a lot more comfortable then the last place, I just had to trade a quieter stall for a more comfortable sleeping area. Makes sense in this hell hole I guess. I quickly tried to fall sleep, but was woken up by one of the black guys underneath me.
He poked me and asked if I wanted a bottom bunk. That one of the guys was getting moved and a bottom bunk was going to be available. Oh hell yeah! I jumped on that shit with the quickness. It took some time to clean the place up, but bottom bunks were like the Rolls Royce of this place. Not only can hang covers around your area to make a tent like thing, but...well that's pretty much all you can do, but that's fucking awesome. Lights didn't matter anymore, I was in my own little Batcave in that piece. I felt like a little kid making a fort.
Also, by taking the bottom bunk when I had just arrived, it seemed that I had upset a lot of the people sleeping on top bunks for awhile. Uh oh...
10:00 am
I got situated just before lunch. Thank goodness, it was starving. Those bologna and cheese sandwiches never tasted so good.
Back in the C block there was more people coming and going. A couple of crackheads showed up. I was lucky enough to have them in my area. Me being one of the lighter skinned people in this place, they felt at ease with me? I dunno, but they were very talkative with me. One of them especially was a chatter box, and had the memory span of a goldfish. I felt bad, but I kept switching my story when I talked to him, and every time he seemed a little confused, but rolled with it. It was funny, you should have been there. In any case, it seemed I befriended him and a couple other honkies in the process. we all holed up in the same corner.
One was a dealer, a young person who liked the Mars Volta.
Another was an even younger person who had a problem with breaking into peoples cars and stealing stuff that wasn't his.
The crackhead I mentioned earlier, he was always talking about how proud he was of getting into fights in this place, and that he was always getting moved and how he knew this place front to back. Are those things to be proud of? I guess to a crackhead maybe. We formed an unholy white boy alliance for a little bit.
Whatever, it made the time go by quicker. We played spades and I even got to borrow some deodorant from these guys. Thank goodness, my arm pits smelled like sewer mold.
4:00 pm
Dinner time! Weeeeeeeeeeeee. The fearsome foursome sat together and made jokes about things, Nick Hogan was a topic we discussed. I mentioned I saw him. It seemed he was not liked in these confines, and that people thought very low of him. I guess that was why he was kept away form the general population. Being a celeb in jail can't be fun, unless your Martha Stewart.
We got back to our small apartment and watched some George Lopez for a little bit. Everyone loves George Lopez. The crackhead told me how he had this show on dvd. Good for him.
Another white boy came up to us. He called himself the master of this block or something. Like he had been in this particular room the longest. He wanted to lay spades, so all of us except the music dealer went and played with him. This kid thought he was hood. He had a headset on as he played cards with us and I guess was listening to a rap song of some sort. He started to bob his head and and flail his arms up like a ghetto gangster or something. The place erupted. By erupted I mean with laughter. All the black people in the room were watching him and were mocking and insulting him to his face. They would shout, "Word!" and other comments in his face and would mimic his mannerisms right back to him. The kid did his best to ignore him, I kinda felt bad for the kid.
Kinda.
I am not sure what we did for the rest of the day, but it was probably watch some court shows or the news. I will never understand the infatuation with court shows is. We are in jail, why do we want to see a show where a judge is going to fuck over someone else? Is that supposed to make me feel better?
At night, instead of calming down, this place got even louder. Me and my group got into a debated football conversation. They started to call me stat boy because whenever they had a question about anything, I had the answer. It got doubly bad when the Bucs or any other Florida team was mentioned. These debates would range into the early parts of the night. I got so mixed in and involved that I hadn't noticed the noise around me had subsided.
"Hey, Bucs Bonus. Shut the fuck up!" Came the voice of one of the black guys I guess trying to get some sleep now.
"Ask Stat Boy a question!" Came from another corner of the place. The place was starting to get loud again. They would repeat what someone else said and it would never get old, because each time it was said they would burst out laughing again.
"Hey, whose the starter for the Bucs?"
I knew what was coming, but I obliged, "Jeff Garcia." I said i a loud enough voice so whoever asked the question would hear me.
"Jeff Garcia he said!" Laughter. It was fucking def comedy jam up in this place. It was like Chris Tucker was on stage.
If I kept egging these people, I'd never get to sleep. I laid down in my dark comfortable sleeping area and looked up at the bunk for a long time. I had to be around one am or something, but I couldn't sleep. I resorted to my age old technique I used to use back when I had sleep anxiety; I started to recite rpgs story progression in my head. The hardest part was always picking the game. The game I used the most was Final Fantasy 4. I know that game like the back of my hand. this time the game I chose was Lufia. I got to Gades invasion before I finally lost track and fell asleep. Another successful trip down rpg memory lane.
Day five was over. Everything got flipped turned upside down on me today. I had to meet and greet new people. My comfort level was low, but I managed in the end. I just hoped that they wouldn't move me any more.
3:00 am
Breakfast again. The only thing special about this meal was that Tyrone was acting nervous. I felt the need to ask what the deal was. he told me that he had been in this place for thirty-something odd days and still hadn't seen a judge. He said that if he didn't see a judge soon (like around 40 days in) and get a sentence that they would have to release him. I found it funny that they would keep anyone in here for that long of a stint without seeing a judge. It seemed that he was close to getting released if they didn't send him away, thus his nervousness.
In any case, I just thought of the what-if scenario of me being in here for that long. I guess I would be itching to not see a judge too. However, sleep was more important to me at the moment. I said a little prayer for a bunch of things and fell to sleep again.
Noise. I have no idea what time it is, but I am woken up by one of the intercoms blasting my name in our block. I heard some of the inmates calling me out by my nickname. I had no idea what was going on. I looked down to question my two cellmates, but both Tyrone and Tony were gone. I guess Tyrone didn't escape the judges wrath, poor soul.
I asked a wandering fellow what was going on, he said something that blew my mind. "Your going home Cliff."
I had to rub my eyes. I didn't question anything, I just picked up all my junk (mat, pillow, razor, etc.) and ran downstairs. The cop by the cell door took a look at my badge and let me out. I stood in the middle of the multi-roomed cell and took a deep breath. Was I going home so early?
I waited there for what seemed like eternity. Apparently I wasn't the only one leaving, they started calling other peoples names and before I knew it there was like seven or so people out in the hall standing around like idiots. Thankfully I didn't have to carry all my junk, the made me toss all that stuff in some bin. I was back to the bear minimums, what I came into this place with. Everyone else had bags of candy and other things they had collected. Who cared about that crap, we were getting released!
Or so I thought at the time. Rather, that was what I was hoping. Little did I know that all this waiting around just meant I was being transferred. I guess they don't keep anyone in the same spot for a long time for a reason. This process of moving us around took at least two hours. Most of us got separated into different areas of the jail. not that I knew any of these people. It was just a long period of awkward silence.
Warning: Celebrity Sighting! That's right, I saw someone of certain status in this joint! The one, the only Nick Hogan. Ok, who really cares about Nick Hogan, but I found it funny that I was in the same jail that he was serving in for that stupid shit he did. I saw him when I was being transferred into my new area. I didn't talk to him, I just passed by. I think he was working or something, seemed busy.
Moving on.
My new place of rest. It was a building of some sort. Reminded me of a summer camp style bunking area. It was like a huge one story house. Instead of having mini semi-rooms, this place just had one big wide open area with bunk beds in every corner. The room I went to had to be right out of a boys N the hood sketch. Negros overfilled this place, most of the other folk in here, if they were white or anything else were old and scrawny. The blacks most definitely controlled this area. I don't want to say I was afraid of them; let's just say one of them was wearing a damn eye patch. Really?
Since this place was more closed off, and only had one story the noise was amplified to the tenth power. And here I thought the other place was a tad loud. I found an empty bunk in one of the end corners, top of course. At least this mat I picked up was a lot more comfortable then the last place, I just had to trade a quieter stall for a more comfortable sleeping area. Makes sense in this hell hole I guess. I quickly tried to fall sleep, but was woken up by one of the black guys underneath me.
He poked me and asked if I wanted a bottom bunk. That one of the guys was getting moved and a bottom bunk was going to be available. Oh hell yeah! I jumped on that shit with the quickness. It took some time to clean the place up, but bottom bunks were like the Rolls Royce of this place. Not only can hang covers around your area to make a tent like thing, but...well that's pretty much all you can do, but that's fucking awesome. Lights didn't matter anymore, I was in my own little Batcave in that piece. I felt like a little kid making a fort.
Also, by taking the bottom bunk when I had just arrived, it seemed that I had upset a lot of the people sleeping on top bunks for awhile. Uh oh...
10:00 am
I got situated just before lunch. Thank goodness, it was starving. Those bologna and cheese sandwiches never tasted so good.
Back in the C block there was more people coming and going. A couple of crackheads showed up. I was lucky enough to have them in my area. Me being one of the lighter skinned people in this place, they felt at ease with me? I dunno, but they were very talkative with me. One of them especially was a chatter box, and had the memory span of a goldfish. I felt bad, but I kept switching my story when I talked to him, and every time he seemed a little confused, but rolled with it. It was funny, you should have been there. In any case, it seemed I befriended him and a couple other honkies in the process. we all holed up in the same corner.
One was a dealer, a young person who liked the Mars Volta.
Another was an even younger person who had a problem with breaking into peoples cars and stealing stuff that wasn't his.
The crackhead I mentioned earlier, he was always talking about how proud he was of getting into fights in this place, and that he was always getting moved and how he knew this place front to back. Are those things to be proud of? I guess to a crackhead maybe. We formed an unholy white boy alliance for a little bit.
Whatever, it made the time go by quicker. We played spades and I even got to borrow some deodorant from these guys. Thank goodness, my arm pits smelled like sewer mold.
4:00 pm
Dinner time! Weeeeeeeeeeeee. The fearsome foursome sat together and made jokes about things, Nick Hogan was a topic we discussed. I mentioned I saw him. It seemed he was not liked in these confines, and that people thought very low of him. I guess that was why he was kept away form the general population. Being a celeb in jail can't be fun, unless your Martha Stewart.
We got back to our small apartment and watched some George Lopez for a little bit. Everyone loves George Lopez. The crackhead told me how he had this show on dvd. Good for him.
Another white boy came up to us. He called himself the master of this block or something. Like he had been in this particular room the longest. He wanted to lay spades, so all of us except the music dealer went and played with him. This kid thought he was hood. He had a headset on as he played cards with us and I guess was listening to a rap song of some sort. He started to bob his head and and flail his arms up like a ghetto gangster or something. The place erupted. By erupted I mean with laughter. All the black people in the room were watching him and were mocking and insulting him to his face. They would shout, "Word!" and other comments in his face and would mimic his mannerisms right back to him. The kid did his best to ignore him, I kinda felt bad for the kid.
Kinda.
I am not sure what we did for the rest of the day, but it was probably watch some court shows or the news. I will never understand the infatuation with court shows is. We are in jail, why do we want to see a show where a judge is going to fuck over someone else? Is that supposed to make me feel better?
At night, instead of calming down, this place got even louder. Me and my group got into a debated football conversation. They started to call me stat boy because whenever they had a question about anything, I had the answer. It got doubly bad when the Bucs or any other Florida team was mentioned. These debates would range into the early parts of the night. I got so mixed in and involved that I hadn't noticed the noise around me had subsided.
"Hey, Bucs Bonus. Shut the fuck up!" Came the voice of one of the black guys I guess trying to get some sleep now.
"Ask Stat Boy a question!" Came from another corner of the place. The place was starting to get loud again. They would repeat what someone else said and it would never get old, because each time it was said they would burst out laughing again.
"Hey, whose the starter for the Bucs?"
I knew what was coming, but I obliged, "Jeff Garcia." I said i a loud enough voice so whoever asked the question would hear me.
"Jeff Garcia he said!" Laughter. It was fucking def comedy jam up in this place. It was like Chris Tucker was on stage.
If I kept egging these people, I'd never get to sleep. I laid down in my dark comfortable sleeping area and looked up at the bunk for a long time. I had to be around one am or something, but I couldn't sleep. I resorted to my age old technique I used to use back when I had sleep anxiety; I started to recite rpgs story progression in my head. The hardest part was always picking the game. The game I used the most was Final Fantasy 4. I know that game like the back of my hand. this time the game I chose was Lufia. I got to Gades invasion before I finally lost track and fell asleep. Another successful trip down rpg memory lane.
Day five was over. Everything got flipped turned upside down on me today. I had to meet and greet new people. My comfort level was low, but I managed in the end. I just hoped that they wouldn't move me any more.
Day 4
Day 4 - Sunday
3:00 am
Again it felt like I had just closed my eyes when I was getting nudged to wake up for the morning goulash. I faintly remember this breakfast though.
Everything was starting to get routine in this lace. That kind of scared me. I walked down the stairs in silence, as did most everyone else. The banter of barter had begun even before people were starting to get their food. I wait my turn in the line of infinite losers just to satisfy my hunger. I hadn't shaved or done any of the sort since I had left my house those few years ago. Time was not being kind to me. Usually I pray that the day lasts longer because I had so much to enjoy. Now, I wanted those long days to end as quickly as humanly possible. I was given no such respite.
I grab my Styrofoam tray of whatever along with two slices of white bread and start to walk off. I get yelled at. I stop. Looking back around I see that the guard who was serving us was yelling at me to come back. I had no idea what was going on, so I just complied and stood there like a jackass. here's what he told me.
"Oh, you got the butt end of the bread. You get an extra slice."
REALLY?
I get an extra slice of bread, how kind of you mister! You made my day. /sarcasm
Ugh!
Just give me my crappy meal and shut up already. I hope he didn't think that extra piece of bread meant anything to me. I'm one of the few people who doesn't mind the butt of the bread. I think breakfast was some sort of potato stew thing or something. It didn't taste bad honestly.
Like it mattered. I ate my food, said a couple jokes about the cop and went back to my hole in the wall to hibernate as long as they would let me.
9:00 am
Cursing. That's what woke my up at first.
Lights. That's what kept me up afterwards.
Something had happened and all the lights in our block were on. Me being on the top bunk meant this sucked big time for me. I don't do sleep well with lights in my face and I can't sleep on my stomach sober. I would come to find out that one of the newer inmates was complaining to the cops that the lights in the shower were off and that he was paranoid or something and wanted them on. He asked enough to get on the smart ass side of the cops, so whoever was stationed to guard us that day felt the need to punish us all. They did turn on the lights in the shower, along with every other light in the damn holding cell.
UGH!!!!
So we all suffer. And the person responsible suffers as well. Not physically mind you, but verbally the dude got berated.
"Dude was fucking scared of getting raped in the dark."
"Fucking pussy."
"I'll give him something to be scared of."
"This shit head fucked all of our days up."
and so on...
They didn't do anything to the guy, but honestly I didn't even see who they were screaming at. This was the first day that I didn't get to sleep all the way to lunch. I figured today was going to suck.
The news was on. Batman was doing phenomenal as expected, but wow was it doing better then I anticipated. First thing I'd do when I got out of this joint was to watch this movie. My soul demanded it. Another thing I saw was news on Metrocon.
Metrocon? Damn! I was supposed to go to that with my friends. I had completed forgotten that it was this week. I hadn't seen AJ and the gang in some tie, those cons were always so childish and pure. They were a good source of jokes and it made me sad to know I would have to wait another year before enjoying that event again. The funny thing was, was as we watched the news on that anime convention every inmate yelled and joked about what kind of lame ass loser types would be caught dead dressing up like cartoons and going to those pansy ass meetings.
"Yeah..."
I didn't stand up and declare that I went to those cons. I kinda just nodded at the few jokes and let it be. Really, would you blame me? I was petrified in that place. I wasn't sure what any of these people were capable of if pushed or looked at the wrong way. Best just let them think of me as a cop beating inmate. One of the guys.
10:00 am
Lunch was actually not bad. Meat patty of some sort and with the bread they gave us, I made a hamburger of sorts. No ketchup or anything fancy, but the meat had enough sauce around it that I could sort of dip the burger and soak in all the juices. plus, there was a cookie for an added touch. How thoughtful. I ate and went back upstairs and read. The lights made it impossible to even think about sleeping.
Tony started to bother me as I laid in my bed trying to read some more of the SW book. Someone had busted out a chess board and he asked me if I wanted to play.
Chess? Haven't played since like High School. "Sure." I say nonchalantly, and I jumped down and we went downstairs to one of the tables and set up a game. My armpits smelled like rotten dead baby fungi. I figured it would be best to play with them at my side. No one had yet came to me and questioned it, so maybe I was doing a good job of hiding the funk?
Downstairs was like Def comedy jam. The blacks had set up a barber shop of sorts, equipped with a seat for hair cuts and everything! I was the whitest person downstairs as far as I could tell. Eyes darted to me and Tony as he set up the game. I was going to play chess in jail? I guess so. Whatever to pass the time.
First game was a warm up game. I got the best of him in like thirty minutes. The next game was over quickly, he lost his queen early and I just destroyed all his pieces systematically. The next game I did the same thing, but I got rid of all his pieces just playing around and he pulled a mulligan out on me for not mating him in five turns afterwards. Game four I was barely paying attention, lost my queen in a silly sacrifice by him and still managed to win.
Money.
Tony was starting to looked a little peeved off. So, I sandbagged the next two games and gave him some wins. I don't need someone sleeping in the same room as me mad at me and then stabbing me with a shank as I sleep. Let the poor soul get some wins to boost his ego, what did I care if I won or not? Was I going to come back and brag that I was a better chess player then some prisoner?
Of course I was! Nigga didn't have shit on me!
After the last two losses dude asked me if I played spades. now things were picking up. Somehow this reminded me of lunch period at Leto. I used to play spades all during lunch. Spades was my game, I dominated in that game. Cheating or not. tony found two other players and picked me, Cliff as his partner. Smart choice.
Ugh, that reminds me. One of the guys we played against was disgusting. Dude had pink eye or something going on his his left eye. It was beat red and ooze was coming out of it. It was nasty. Sadly no one else was down to play, so we had to get him.
...
I mean, when I'm telling you this guy's eye was ugly looking, I'm not even exaggerating. he said because he didn't have solution or a case to put his contacts in, that his eye had gotten infected. it looked like someone had poured hot sauce in his eye and then some antacid to make it ooze out like an eruption.
Enough? heh
Long game told shortly, we won every major game needed to win all three games by a huge margin. Afterwards I ran upstairs and washed my hands thoroughly a couple times. Tony followed suit. He had the same thoughts as me, dudes eye was sick with it.
4:00 pm
Dinner was fairly good on that day. Meatballs and mashed potatoes. best meal I had in that place.
I guess there was a board game frenzy going on this day. Monopoly was the next game of choice. Awesome, I hate Monopoly, but that game does a damn fine job at wasting time. Just what the doctored ordered.
The contestants were: Me, a crack head, Tony, some guy who looked to be a back Neo-Nazi from American History X, and some black dude who couldn't stay still. (crack head number 2?) I picked the boat as my piece.
I ended up owning the yellow blocks of the game and held my own till the end, but American History man was cheating or something. He dominated and after a couple of hours, I gave up. It was fun for what it was. there was plenty of crack headed moments, like people stealing property and smuggling money under the table. And they wonder why they are in this place?
I was in the game circle now. They asked me to play Risk next. Sweet another boring, long as hell board game. Sunday was flying by now. I accepted, but sadly I knew it would never be as glorious as the sessions me, Dan, Ravi, and Chris ever were a part of.
Risk is so gawd damn boring. I was like 3rd out out of five people. That was enough for me, I was board gamed out. I played stupid and thinned out all my armies which left me wide open for counter attacks. My cards came and went like the quickness.
I went back to my bed. Night had come back to greet me. I loved night time, it meant another day had come and gone. I won't lie, I had a blast on Sunday. I had finally gotten used to most of the people I was staying with and most of their comments were starting to actually strike me as comical. I was getting comfortable with my entrapment.
I stayed up the rest of the night watching Oceans Eleven. I want that outfit Brad Pitt wears at the end of the movie when he comes to pick up Billy Ocean. "Ted Nugent called he wants his shirt back."
I love that shirt!
With me getting more comfortable I had a feeling the next coupel of days weren't going to be so bad. I was meshing well with my convict compadres.
3:00 am
Again it felt like I had just closed my eyes when I was getting nudged to wake up for the morning goulash. I faintly remember this breakfast though.
Everything was starting to get routine in this lace. That kind of scared me. I walked down the stairs in silence, as did most everyone else. The banter of barter had begun even before people were starting to get their food. I wait my turn in the line of infinite losers just to satisfy my hunger. I hadn't shaved or done any of the sort since I had left my house those few years ago. Time was not being kind to me. Usually I pray that the day lasts longer because I had so much to enjoy. Now, I wanted those long days to end as quickly as humanly possible. I was given no such respite.
I grab my Styrofoam tray of whatever along with two slices of white bread and start to walk off. I get yelled at. I stop. Looking back around I see that the guard who was serving us was yelling at me to come back. I had no idea what was going on, so I just complied and stood there like a jackass. here's what he told me.
"Oh, you got the butt end of the bread. You get an extra slice."
REALLY?
I get an extra slice of bread, how kind of you mister! You made my day. /sarcasm
Ugh!
Just give me my crappy meal and shut up already. I hope he didn't think that extra piece of bread meant anything to me. I'm one of the few people who doesn't mind the butt of the bread. I think breakfast was some sort of potato stew thing or something. It didn't taste bad honestly.
Like it mattered. I ate my food, said a couple jokes about the cop and went back to my hole in the wall to hibernate as long as they would let me.
9:00 am
Cursing. That's what woke my up at first.
Lights. That's what kept me up afterwards.
Something had happened and all the lights in our block were on. Me being on the top bunk meant this sucked big time for me. I don't do sleep well with lights in my face and I can't sleep on my stomach sober. I would come to find out that one of the newer inmates was complaining to the cops that the lights in the shower were off and that he was paranoid or something and wanted them on. He asked enough to get on the smart ass side of the cops, so whoever was stationed to guard us that day felt the need to punish us all. They did turn on the lights in the shower, along with every other light in the damn holding cell.
UGH!!!!
So we all suffer. And the person responsible suffers as well. Not physically mind you, but verbally the dude got berated.
"Dude was fucking scared of getting raped in the dark."
"Fucking pussy."
"I'll give him something to be scared of."
"This shit head fucked all of our days up."
and so on...
They didn't do anything to the guy, but honestly I didn't even see who they were screaming at. This was the first day that I didn't get to sleep all the way to lunch. I figured today was going to suck.
The news was on. Batman was doing phenomenal as expected, but wow was it doing better then I anticipated. First thing I'd do when I got out of this joint was to watch this movie. My soul demanded it. Another thing I saw was news on Metrocon.
Metrocon? Damn! I was supposed to go to that with my friends. I had completed forgotten that it was this week. I hadn't seen AJ and the gang in some tie, those cons were always so childish and pure. They were a good source of jokes and it made me sad to know I would have to wait another year before enjoying that event again. The funny thing was, was as we watched the news on that anime convention every inmate yelled and joked about what kind of lame ass loser types would be caught dead dressing up like cartoons and going to those pansy ass meetings.
"Yeah..."
I didn't stand up and declare that I went to those cons. I kinda just nodded at the few jokes and let it be. Really, would you blame me? I was petrified in that place. I wasn't sure what any of these people were capable of if pushed or looked at the wrong way. Best just let them think of me as a cop beating inmate. One of the guys.
10:00 am
Lunch was actually not bad. Meat patty of some sort and with the bread they gave us, I made a hamburger of sorts. No ketchup or anything fancy, but the meat had enough sauce around it that I could sort of dip the burger and soak in all the juices. plus, there was a cookie for an added touch. How thoughtful. I ate and went back upstairs and read. The lights made it impossible to even think about sleeping.
Tony started to bother me as I laid in my bed trying to read some more of the SW book. Someone had busted out a chess board and he asked me if I wanted to play.
Chess? Haven't played since like High School. "Sure." I say nonchalantly, and I jumped down and we went downstairs to one of the tables and set up a game. My armpits smelled like rotten dead baby fungi. I figured it would be best to play with them at my side. No one had yet came to me and questioned it, so maybe I was doing a good job of hiding the funk?
Downstairs was like Def comedy jam. The blacks had set up a barber shop of sorts, equipped with a seat for hair cuts and everything! I was the whitest person downstairs as far as I could tell. Eyes darted to me and Tony as he set up the game. I was going to play chess in jail? I guess so. Whatever to pass the time.
First game was a warm up game. I got the best of him in like thirty minutes. The next game was over quickly, he lost his queen early and I just destroyed all his pieces systematically. The next game I did the same thing, but I got rid of all his pieces just playing around and he pulled a mulligan out on me for not mating him in five turns afterwards. Game four I was barely paying attention, lost my queen in a silly sacrifice by him and still managed to win.
Money.
Tony was starting to looked a little peeved off. So, I sandbagged the next two games and gave him some wins. I don't need someone sleeping in the same room as me mad at me and then stabbing me with a shank as I sleep. Let the poor soul get some wins to boost his ego, what did I care if I won or not? Was I going to come back and brag that I was a better chess player then some prisoner?
Of course I was! Nigga didn't have shit on me!
After the last two losses dude asked me if I played spades. now things were picking up. Somehow this reminded me of lunch period at Leto. I used to play spades all during lunch. Spades was my game, I dominated in that game. Cheating or not. tony found two other players and picked me, Cliff as his partner. Smart choice.
Ugh, that reminds me. One of the guys we played against was disgusting. Dude had pink eye or something going on his his left eye. It was beat red and ooze was coming out of it. It was nasty. Sadly no one else was down to play, so we had to get him.
...
I mean, when I'm telling you this guy's eye was ugly looking, I'm not even exaggerating. he said because he didn't have solution or a case to put his contacts in, that his eye had gotten infected. it looked like someone had poured hot sauce in his eye and then some antacid to make it ooze out like an eruption.
Enough? heh
Long game told shortly, we won every major game needed to win all three games by a huge margin. Afterwards I ran upstairs and washed my hands thoroughly a couple times. Tony followed suit. He had the same thoughts as me, dudes eye was sick with it.
4:00 pm
Dinner was fairly good on that day. Meatballs and mashed potatoes. best meal I had in that place.
I guess there was a board game frenzy going on this day. Monopoly was the next game of choice. Awesome, I hate Monopoly, but that game does a damn fine job at wasting time. Just what the doctored ordered.
The contestants were: Me, a crack head, Tony, some guy who looked to be a back Neo-Nazi from American History X, and some black dude who couldn't stay still. (crack head number 2?) I picked the boat as my piece.
I ended up owning the yellow blocks of the game and held my own till the end, but American History man was cheating or something. He dominated and after a couple of hours, I gave up. It was fun for what it was. there was plenty of crack headed moments, like people stealing property and smuggling money under the table. And they wonder why they are in this place?
I was in the game circle now. They asked me to play Risk next. Sweet another boring, long as hell board game. Sunday was flying by now. I accepted, but sadly I knew it would never be as glorious as the sessions me, Dan, Ravi, and Chris ever were a part of.
Risk is so gawd damn boring. I was like 3rd out out of five people. That was enough for me, I was board gamed out. I played stupid and thinned out all my armies which left me wide open for counter attacks. My cards came and went like the quickness.
I went back to my bed. Night had come back to greet me. I loved night time, it meant another day had come and gone. I won't lie, I had a blast on Sunday. I had finally gotten used to most of the people I was staying with and most of their comments were starting to actually strike me as comical. I was getting comfortable with my entrapment.
I stayed up the rest of the night watching Oceans Eleven. I want that outfit Brad Pitt wears at the end of the movie when he comes to pick up Billy Ocean. "Ted Nugent called he wants his shirt back."
I love that shirt!
With me getting more comfortable I had a feeling the next coupel of days weren't going to be so bad. I was meshing well with my convict compadres.
Day 3
Day 3 - Saturday
3:00 am
Wake up. It's breakfast time again. It feels like I had no sleep whatsoever. Doing nothing all day sure had a toll on my body. I ached everywhere and my feet hurt like hell. If I were to guess why, I'd bet it was the horrible hard cement floors I did have to stand on every now and then. Jumping off and landing down form the top bunk every couple times a day. Whatever it was, My back and feet hurt the most.
Another problem arose on the third day. I started to smell a distinct rotten Velveeta cheese smell every so often. No surprise there, it was my funky armpits. Ok, so I hadn't taken a bath yet. So what? I'm a weird guy. I was here for a week. I figured no one would want to rape a smell guy. At least that's what I was hoping. So, with that in mind, I figured I could go a week without a bath.
And so I did.
Breakfast was something like stale cereal or something. It's not like it was good enough for me to remember. Ate it quick I did, and then scampered back to my cubby to rest my bones.
10:00 am
Lunch Time, joyous me! I think we were given those awesome sandwiches that they handed out back in the booking area. Delicious! /sarcasm
Whatever. With that in my stomach I went and tried to go back to sleep, but I just started at the ceiling for a long time before giving up. I had to do something to make this day go by quicker.
But what...
So, I figured I'd find a good read and try to find a book to help the day progress. In my small, open cell of a room, there were a couple of books. As I fumbled through them I actually found one that I kinda sorta wanted to read: A Star Wars book.
My friend AJ used to ramble on about these books, but I'm not that big of a nerd. (hahaha) I've only watched the SW movies. This would be a new experience for me. The book was part of the Bounty Hunter Wars or something. Book 2 entitled Slave Ship or something. It was a continuation of the adventures of Boba Fett that universe greatest bounty hunter. Hell, before grabbing onto this thing I didn't even know Boba Fett had survived that pitfall. Oh, the miracles of fiction.
So I had my time shaver. I figure if I could read like eight chapters or so a day that I could make this entrapment seem less dreadful. I doubt I could annoy anyone by just staying in my bed all the time. So, that's what I did. It worked for the most part.
The other inmates were downstairs causing the normal ruckus. Whenever a new person came into this holding block, the regulars would shower them with the same insults, bigotry and profanity that I was greeted with. Thing was, no one in this place looked like me. Someone that didn't belong. I have class, these people were the scum of the earth and didn't mind showing it. Thinking about these facts made me almost sick to my stomach.
Oh well, no use in crying over spilled milk, right?
Movie time began around eleven. I stopped reading every now and then to catch what these convicts would finally agree to watch. Some of the movies they watched on that day were...
Cabin Fever
To Kill a Mockingbird
Batman Returns
Batman Forever
What an all star list!
As I looked down on the people I was staying with, in my bed on the second floor. It almost seemed like an after school day care of sorts. Everyone was always shouting and arguing and cursing and being obnoxious, but when those commercials ended everything calmed down and all eyes were glued to the TV screen. It was almost comical.
Almost.
4:00 pm
Dinner Time! I couldn't wait! /sarcasm Don't remember what we had, don't care. I started to notice things in this place.
Coffee was a hot commodity. Like as in crack like important. People would consume cold coffee at any point in the day. They would trade things like deodorant and tooth paste for just a sliver of coffee grinds. I didn't get it. But I guess it was for the caffeine or something. It made them feel alive? Whatever, I was never a big coffee drinker. I could survive having no energy for a week. I'd just pretend I had mono or something!
The two people I slept with were starting to warm up to me. They kept trying to talk to me, but I just gave them a quick response and went back to my reading. Every once in awhile I would say something that they would laugh about, but I can't really remember those exacts details. One thing they found that was funny was my reason for being here. They pretty much told me to join the club in a way. That everyone in here was getting fucked by the government and authority figures. I knew I was different though. I just knew that I don't go out and search for this kind of nonsense.
But, with me talking to them more and more they finally asked the big question. "Yo, man what's your name?"
I froze. "Uhhhhh, Ryan."
They busted out laughing. "You waited too long. We know that's a fake name. C'mon man, we ain't gonna hunt you down when we get out of here," they said trying to reassure me. Really? I wasn't too sure about that one, but to make them feel like dumb asses as they laughed at me, I grabbed my ID badge and showed them my name.
They got another good laugh when they found out that I wasn't lying, but decided to give me a nickname instead of calling me Ryan. They shortened my last name and after that point I was called, "Cliff."
I found out there names too. The toothless black man who looked like Tyrone Biggums was actually called Tyrone! The other black man who looked around my age was Anthony, or Tony for short.
Tony, Tyrone and Cliff....BFF.
I could feel a new social link open up in my life. /sarcasm
Tony was reading a newspaper. I could hear him flipping the paper thin pages over from above him.
Newspaper? I wonder what sort of zaniness was going on in the world while I was stuck in this joint. I looked over the bunk so I could get a glimpse of what he was reading. In all actuality the more I thought about it, the more I just wanted that days sudoku. That is if no one else had gobbled it up yet. So, I asked him to let me see the paper when he was done. He did, and I quickly scammed though the comics for my precious numbers puzzle.
It was still there! And it hadn't been touched, heh. I tore it out as Tony looked on. He was like "Awww hell nah. This nigga thinks he smart or something." I just ignored him with a smile as I asked to borrow a pen. He mentioned that they used to have someone bunking with them that used to always play these games. Tyrone jumped in the conversation speaking something about him never being able to figure them out. It being Saturday meant that this was the hardest level sudoku the newspapers published. I didn't say anything to them, I just borrowed a pen and went to work.
I was glad this was a hard one. The harder it was meant the more time I would waste trying to decipher it and thus make the day go by quicker. Sadly, I did this one in like record time. Thirty or so minutes which greatly disappointed me. I gave back my pen with a hint of displeasure on my face. tony took that as me giving up. The man said some jokes before I dropped the completed puzzle too.
Tony and Tyrone didn't stop talking about how they had never seen anyone complete one of those so fast or something, that they were amazed. Yay, groupies.
The day light started to remove itself from my bedchamber which meant the end of my bounty hunter exploration. What I got out of that days read was that Boba Fett was a bad ass. Wish he didn't die (or not die) like a bitch in the third movie, heh.
There was another movie we watched as night crept inside the prison, but I can't remember it. That night it took me forever to fall asleep for some reason. But eventually it happened, and it was good.
Day 3 was over.
3:00 am
Wake up. It's breakfast time again. It feels like I had no sleep whatsoever. Doing nothing all day sure had a toll on my body. I ached everywhere and my feet hurt like hell. If I were to guess why, I'd bet it was the horrible hard cement floors I did have to stand on every now and then. Jumping off and landing down form the top bunk every couple times a day. Whatever it was, My back and feet hurt the most.
Another problem arose on the third day. I started to smell a distinct rotten Velveeta cheese smell every so often. No surprise there, it was my funky armpits. Ok, so I hadn't taken a bath yet. So what? I'm a weird guy. I was here for a week. I figured no one would want to rape a smell guy. At least that's what I was hoping. So, with that in mind, I figured I could go a week without a bath.
And so I did.
Breakfast was something like stale cereal or something. It's not like it was good enough for me to remember. Ate it quick I did, and then scampered back to my cubby to rest my bones.
10:00 am
Lunch Time, joyous me! I think we were given those awesome sandwiches that they handed out back in the booking area. Delicious! /sarcasm
Whatever. With that in my stomach I went and tried to go back to sleep, but I just started at the ceiling for a long time before giving up. I had to do something to make this day go by quicker.
But what...
So, I figured I'd find a good read and try to find a book to help the day progress. In my small, open cell of a room, there were a couple of books. As I fumbled through them I actually found one that I kinda sorta wanted to read: A Star Wars book.
My friend AJ used to ramble on about these books, but I'm not that big of a nerd. (hahaha) I've only watched the SW movies. This would be a new experience for me. The book was part of the Bounty Hunter Wars or something. Book 2 entitled Slave Ship or something. It was a continuation of the adventures of Boba Fett that universe greatest bounty hunter. Hell, before grabbing onto this thing I didn't even know Boba Fett had survived that pitfall. Oh, the miracles of fiction.
So I had my time shaver. I figure if I could read like eight chapters or so a day that I could make this entrapment seem less dreadful. I doubt I could annoy anyone by just staying in my bed all the time. So, that's what I did. It worked for the most part.
The other inmates were downstairs causing the normal ruckus. Whenever a new person came into this holding block, the regulars would shower them with the same insults, bigotry and profanity that I was greeted with. Thing was, no one in this place looked like me. Someone that didn't belong. I have class, these people were the scum of the earth and didn't mind showing it. Thinking about these facts made me almost sick to my stomach.
Oh well, no use in crying over spilled milk, right?
Movie time began around eleven. I stopped reading every now and then to catch what these convicts would finally agree to watch. Some of the movies they watched on that day were...
Cabin Fever
To Kill a Mockingbird
Batman Returns
Batman Forever
What an all star list!
As I looked down on the people I was staying with, in my bed on the second floor. It almost seemed like an after school day care of sorts. Everyone was always shouting and arguing and cursing and being obnoxious, but when those commercials ended everything calmed down and all eyes were glued to the TV screen. It was almost comical.
Almost.
4:00 pm
Dinner Time! I couldn't wait! /sarcasm Don't remember what we had, don't care. I started to notice things in this place.
Coffee was a hot commodity. Like as in crack like important. People would consume cold coffee at any point in the day. They would trade things like deodorant and tooth paste for just a sliver of coffee grinds. I didn't get it. But I guess it was for the caffeine or something. It made them feel alive? Whatever, I was never a big coffee drinker. I could survive having no energy for a week. I'd just pretend I had mono or something!
The two people I slept with were starting to warm up to me. They kept trying to talk to me, but I just gave them a quick response and went back to my reading. Every once in awhile I would say something that they would laugh about, but I can't really remember those exacts details. One thing they found that was funny was my reason for being here. They pretty much told me to join the club in a way. That everyone in here was getting fucked by the government and authority figures. I knew I was different though. I just knew that I don't go out and search for this kind of nonsense.
But, with me talking to them more and more they finally asked the big question. "Yo, man what's your name?"
I froze. "Uhhhhh, Ryan."
They busted out laughing. "You waited too long. We know that's a fake name. C'mon man, we ain't gonna hunt you down when we get out of here," they said trying to reassure me. Really? I wasn't too sure about that one, but to make them feel like dumb asses as they laughed at me, I grabbed my ID badge and showed them my name.
They got another good laugh when they found out that I wasn't lying, but decided to give me a nickname instead of calling me Ryan. They shortened my last name and after that point I was called, "Cliff."
I found out there names too. The toothless black man who looked like Tyrone Biggums was actually called Tyrone! The other black man who looked around my age was Anthony, or Tony for short.
Tony, Tyrone and Cliff....BFF.
I could feel a new social link open up in my life. /sarcasm
Tony was reading a newspaper. I could hear him flipping the paper thin pages over from above him.
Newspaper? I wonder what sort of zaniness was going on in the world while I was stuck in this joint. I looked over the bunk so I could get a glimpse of what he was reading. In all actuality the more I thought about it, the more I just wanted that days sudoku. That is if no one else had gobbled it up yet. So, I asked him to let me see the paper when he was done. He did, and I quickly scammed though the comics for my precious numbers puzzle.
It was still there! And it hadn't been touched, heh. I tore it out as Tony looked on. He was like "Awww hell nah. This nigga thinks he smart or something." I just ignored him with a smile as I asked to borrow a pen. He mentioned that they used to have someone bunking with them that used to always play these games. Tyrone jumped in the conversation speaking something about him never being able to figure them out. It being Saturday meant that this was the hardest level sudoku the newspapers published. I didn't say anything to them, I just borrowed a pen and went to work.
I was glad this was a hard one. The harder it was meant the more time I would waste trying to decipher it and thus make the day go by quicker. Sadly, I did this one in like record time. Thirty or so minutes which greatly disappointed me. I gave back my pen with a hint of displeasure on my face. tony took that as me giving up. The man said some jokes before I dropped the completed puzzle too.
Tony and Tyrone didn't stop talking about how they had never seen anyone complete one of those so fast or something, that they were amazed. Yay, groupies.
The day light started to remove itself from my bedchamber which meant the end of my bounty hunter exploration. What I got out of that days read was that Boba Fett was a bad ass. Wish he didn't die (or not die) like a bitch in the third movie, heh.
There was another movie we watched as night crept inside the prison, but I can't remember it. That night it took me forever to fall asleep for some reason. But eventually it happened, and it was good.
Day 3 was over.
Day 2
Day 2 - 3:00am
It felt like I had just closed my eyes when someone started to poke at my side. My instincts made me almost jump out of my top bunk. It was the old black man who was sleeping in the bed below me. He nudge my leg and said one word to me.
"Breakfast."
What time was it? There were no clocks inside my new confinement, but I blurted those words out anyways while rubbing my eyes. The old toothless black man told me it was three o'clock in the morning.
...
What the fuck?
Breakfast at three in the freaking morning!? UGH! Does this place try to annoy people? ... Don't answer that. I reluctantly wiped the weariness from myself and went down stairs to where they were handing out our trays.
Inside the white Styrofoam containers were our meals. It would be this way for the rest of my time in this place as well. I had no idea what I was to eat, but from the grumbles of the other people around me, it seemed as if they knew. Some sort of set meal on each day or something. I hoped I wouldn't be here long enough to start memorizing those types of things. Breakfast for Friday was Oatmeal, two boiled eggs, and two pieces of bread with juice and milk to drink. (along with a sugar and salt packet and some honey spread.)
Let me tell you that it was not the hearty breakfast that I was used to. Almost instantly after getting our food did the bartering begin. Eggs for salt. Bread for Sugar. Juice for Milk. It was like a mini marketplace in this place. Everyone was trying to get something more. None of it mattered much to me. I silently ate my oatmeal and bread on one of the tables next to all the other prisoners. The eggs were still in their shells, and it made me gag just thinking about them. I gave them to someone in my table with nothing in return.
I dared not stare at anyone too much. I didn't know how the prison system worked, nor did I care to learn it. I figured if I just said nothing, and stayed in my bed all day long that I could get out of this place without any altercations. Though, there wasn't much to look at anyways. All around me were the lowlifes of this world. Crackheads, homeless, robbers, wife beaters, dealers, and of course myself. I told myself early on that if anyone asked, I would tell them only partial truths. I was in this place alone.
After my less then satisfying meal, I trudged back up into my room, back into my bed and fell asleep once again.
10:00am
Toothless man woke me up again. This time for our next meal, Lunch. It was ten this time. Seven hours in-between meals? I guess that works, but still it was pretty early for lunch in my mind. This time, the food was some sort of blend of soup I think with two hot dogs swimming in it. It didn't taste good in any account, but the oh-so gracious prison gods did reward us with a treat! We got a cookie with our meals this time, YAY! The drinks were something that reminded me of watered down lemon Gatorade. I'd stick with water this time. More chatter, more bartering took place, but I didn't much feel the need to communicate with anyone. I ate my food in silence and went back to my bunk to sleep. I at least was tired enough for that.
4:00pm
Would they please stop waking me up? Toothless Tyrone (he reminded me of Tyrone Biggums (coincidentally enough, his real name was Tyrone!)) woke me up again. Dinner time. At least this guy was looking out for me to an extent. He was nice enough to wake up for when it was time to eat, the black man below me wouldn't do the same. I was just another inmate. Let's try and keep it that way for now.
Dinner was what I expected; nothing fancy. Beans and potatoes mixed with some sort of meat concoction. It didn't taste half bad, but maybe that was because I was comparing it to the last two meals I had just consumed. Afterwards I plopped myself back into my sleeping area and fell asleep once again.
6:00pm
I get woken up once again. Not by anyone poking me, but by many voices down below. One thing about this place, is that it was never truly quiet. During the mid evening no one is quiet in these holding cells. There was a lot of hooting and hollering from down below. As I fixed myself to get a good look of what was going on down stairs (still in my bed mind you.) I noticed that we seemed to be losing our TV. Except, no one was complaining. Everyone in the place was in good moods. They took out the old TV and replaced it with a new one. Apparently this one had cable. We had cable TV in this joint?
Ok. That's pretty cool. What could possibly go wrong with this?
HA.
So after we had a TV with ninety nine channels to browse through, the inmates started to bicker. They were fighting amongst each other over what to watch. Really? The first show they agreed on was a court/judge show. Judge Joe Brown or something. I thought that was odd. Why would people in jail want to see a show about judges? Weren't they the reason they were in here in the first place? People make me wonder sometimes.
The next thing we watched was a movie. A Steven Segal movie. Ugh. There had to be something better then this?
One of the black men took control of the TV schedule. He pretty much switched the channels to whatever he wanted, and that was irritating a lot of the other people. He was going to watch King Kong at nine. No one else wanted to watch it, but him. He was overrun in favor of the rest for us watching UFC fight night.
OK. That was pretty fun to watch. It was like I was in elementary school again. All eyes were glued onto the TV and there wasn't any real turmoil about the decision. The room was in unison watching people get the stuffing beat out of them until it was lights out at 11:30.
I didn't go to sleep until one'ish, but I wasn't looking forward to waking up in two hours just to eat mush.
Day 2 was over before it ever really began. I wouldn't be so lucky to sleep through an entire again for the rest of my stay there.
It felt like I had just closed my eyes when someone started to poke at my side. My instincts made me almost jump out of my top bunk. It was the old black man who was sleeping in the bed below me. He nudge my leg and said one word to me.
"Breakfast."
What time was it? There were no clocks inside my new confinement, but I blurted those words out anyways while rubbing my eyes. The old toothless black man told me it was three o'clock in the morning.
...
What the fuck?
Breakfast at three in the freaking morning!? UGH! Does this place try to annoy people? ... Don't answer that. I reluctantly wiped the weariness from myself and went down stairs to where they were handing out our trays.
Inside the white Styrofoam containers were our meals. It would be this way for the rest of my time in this place as well. I had no idea what I was to eat, but from the grumbles of the other people around me, it seemed as if they knew. Some sort of set meal on each day or something. I hoped I wouldn't be here long enough to start memorizing those types of things. Breakfast for Friday was Oatmeal, two boiled eggs, and two pieces of bread with juice and milk to drink. (along with a sugar and salt packet and some honey spread.)
Let me tell you that it was not the hearty breakfast that I was used to. Almost instantly after getting our food did the bartering begin. Eggs for salt. Bread for Sugar. Juice for Milk. It was like a mini marketplace in this place. Everyone was trying to get something more. None of it mattered much to me. I silently ate my oatmeal and bread on one of the tables next to all the other prisoners. The eggs were still in their shells, and it made me gag just thinking about them. I gave them to someone in my table with nothing in return.
I dared not stare at anyone too much. I didn't know how the prison system worked, nor did I care to learn it. I figured if I just said nothing, and stayed in my bed all day long that I could get out of this place without any altercations. Though, there wasn't much to look at anyways. All around me were the lowlifes of this world. Crackheads, homeless, robbers, wife beaters, dealers, and of course myself. I told myself early on that if anyone asked, I would tell them only partial truths. I was in this place alone.
After my less then satisfying meal, I trudged back up into my room, back into my bed and fell asleep once again.
10:00am
Toothless man woke me up again. This time for our next meal, Lunch. It was ten this time. Seven hours in-between meals? I guess that works, but still it was pretty early for lunch in my mind. This time, the food was some sort of blend of soup I think with two hot dogs swimming in it. It didn't taste good in any account, but the oh-so gracious prison gods did reward us with a treat! We got a cookie with our meals this time, YAY! The drinks were something that reminded me of watered down lemon Gatorade. I'd stick with water this time. More chatter, more bartering took place, but I didn't much feel the need to communicate with anyone. I ate my food in silence and went back to my bunk to sleep. I at least was tired enough for that.
4:00pm
Would they please stop waking me up? Toothless Tyrone (he reminded me of Tyrone Biggums (coincidentally enough, his real name was Tyrone!)) woke me up again. Dinner time. At least this guy was looking out for me to an extent. He was nice enough to wake up for when it was time to eat, the black man below me wouldn't do the same. I was just another inmate. Let's try and keep it that way for now.
Dinner was what I expected; nothing fancy. Beans and potatoes mixed with some sort of meat concoction. It didn't taste half bad, but maybe that was because I was comparing it to the last two meals I had just consumed. Afterwards I plopped myself back into my sleeping area and fell asleep once again.
6:00pm
I get woken up once again. Not by anyone poking me, but by many voices down below. One thing about this place, is that it was never truly quiet. During the mid evening no one is quiet in these holding cells. There was a lot of hooting and hollering from down below. As I fixed myself to get a good look of what was going on down stairs (still in my bed mind you.) I noticed that we seemed to be losing our TV. Except, no one was complaining. Everyone in the place was in good moods. They took out the old TV and replaced it with a new one. Apparently this one had cable. We had cable TV in this joint?
Ok. That's pretty cool. What could possibly go wrong with this?
HA.
So after we had a TV with ninety nine channels to browse through, the inmates started to bicker. They were fighting amongst each other over what to watch. Really? The first show they agreed on was a court/judge show. Judge Joe Brown or something. I thought that was odd. Why would people in jail want to see a show about judges? Weren't they the reason they were in here in the first place? People make me wonder sometimes.
The next thing we watched was a movie. A Steven Segal movie. Ugh. There had to be something better then this?
One of the black men took control of the TV schedule. He pretty much switched the channels to whatever he wanted, and that was irritating a lot of the other people. He was going to watch King Kong at nine. No one else wanted to watch it, but him. He was overrun in favor of the rest for us watching UFC fight night.
OK. That was pretty fun to watch. It was like I was in elementary school again. All eyes were glued onto the TV and there wasn't any real turmoil about the decision. The room was in unison watching people get the stuffing beat out of them until it was lights out at 11:30.
I didn't go to sleep until one'ish, but I wasn't looking forward to waking up in two hours just to eat mush.
Day 2 was over before it ever really began. I wouldn't be so lucky to sleep through an entire again for the rest of my stay there.
Day 1
Wednesday night...
I lie awake in my bed, watching TV and playing games. My hope is that th first day will consist of me sleeping all day long, so I starve myself of rest the entire night in hopes of removing a day of my sentence in slumber. I used to do all nighters all the time, this would be the first one in a LONG time.
The night isn't anything special, I'm just trying to set up the next day...
DAY 1 - Thursday Morning
8:00am
The sun creeps through my windows. I'm still in my bed. I'm waiting for a miracle to happen.
10 days in Jail. Not something I have been looking forward too, but an inevitable outcome of my rash decisions plus the corrupt system at its finest. Now it is something I can't escape. Something that I've been waiting for so it can be over with. Still the image didn't sit well with me, there was nothing I could do at this point.
No miracle.
I get as ready as I can get for something like this. I take a long hot shower. I know it will be the last one I take for a long while. It was a good shower. I eat my last meal as well, cereal.
My job calls. They tell me that the people I had cover for me on Saturday and Sunday won't be able to because they aren't giving out overtime, and those two individuals would have more then 40 hours. They want me to come in because I don't have anyone to cover for me. I pretty much tell them I can't and hang up. At this point my job thinks I am going to Miami for some sort of death in my family. I didn't explain the details, but I told them that much. It will have to suffice for now. I had asked for the next entire week off before they had made that weeks schedule and got lucky.
My calculations had me getting out Friday, or at worst, Saturday morning. I tell my mom I am going to be going on a camping trip. I don't explain much of the details, but she likes to keep tabs on me and wants me to call her every day. I pretty much go under the impression of my phone not getting reception out in nature as the reason why I don't call her. Lame, but it will have to do.
My two alibis are in place. It's 9:30am. I have to be there before 12:00pm. I drive over to my brother's house. He is to drive me over to the Jail. My car will left there. The mood is somber when I arrive. I'm very quiet, completive about the situation. he is unaware of my deep disappointment in him. My friend and myself got next to nothing as far as apologies go from my brother. Now it is I, not him that has to take the brunt of the punishment. He takes me to the jail, it only takes 30 minutes to get there. First, we had to make a stop at the building next door and give them my down payment for staying in jail for these next 10 days. That's right, I had to give them four hundred and twenty five dollars for this whole affair. Cash cow anyone?
It's just after eleven by the time we get out of that place. I curse the system under my breath as I leave. To think I have to give THEM money for me staying locked up is absurd. Sure, it's the fee of the "court cost," but I am losing a week of work for this. It's like I'm losing two weeks of pay instead of just one. Not cool.
The walk to the jail's entrance was long and gloomy. Me and my brother only talked about all the bullshit this whole situation was. Of the three of us, only my friend got out Scott free, (other then having that "no Contest" thing loom on his record.) but I'm glad about that. It's what should have happened to me as well. I guess I'm just not that lucky. But I already knew this.
I get to the desk. What I have in my possession (besides the clothes I am wearing) are my phone, a Gameboy Advance, (for when I get out, I will have something to do while I wait to get picked up) a Sudoku puzzle (level 4 I think) in the hopes that they would at least let me go in with that, my ID, and my yellow wristband. I take no money with me, because if i were to go in with money they would automatically take out ten dollars from whatever I brought with me.
It's just before twelve now and I tell my brother that I will call him when I get out. We exchange a hug. A heartfelt one at that too. Despite all his shortcomings, he is still my brother and I could never turn my back on him. That, something I was very conflicted with during this whole ordeal, is clearer to me now then ever before. He's lucky to have a brother like me. I wonder if he knows that.
He also helps me out with my little "lie" with my mom. He says that he will call her a couple days later and tell her that he got a text from me saying that I wasn't getting any reception while I am supposedly camping. That should ease her mind a little while I stay out of contact with her for 10 days. I just hope she doesn't worry about me too much in the mean time.
It's now twelve o'clock and time for me to go in. I give them my name and they tell me to sit and wait for the officer to usher me into the booking area. The cop comes in and after a few jokes from me, frisks me. He asks if I have any drugs or concealed weapons in my possession. Honestly? He takes everything from within my pockets, and no, my Sudoku wasn't allowed to go in with me. He leads me into a room where I have to give them all of my information. They show me all of the stuff I had in my pocket and after making me describe it all, place it in a bag. I am then asked to go inside a room and strip. That's right, full cavity search time guys! I get to spread my cheeks and lift my sack, literally. Ugh, this is the second time this place has made me do this. I am pretty sure my friend, when we came in a couple months back didn't have to do it back then, but I did....and now again.
Some of the other people waiting in the same room with me don't have to go through this ordeal. Some do. What is the reasoning behind this? That some people have to get naked and some don't. Like I am a threatening presence. This place disgusts me and I will have to deal with it for a week. After they process the few of us that are in that small room, they put us in a small room.
In the room sat three other people. One guy looked nice enough. He was very compliant with the cops and didn't have a sour look on his face. If I could look at myself, I would say I had a blank look on my face. This guy was a heavy set man. He told me that they arrested him while he was in Publix shopping. He had a couple cans of Chef Boyardee, but he needed a shopping cart to continue with his shopping. Now, I've worked at Publix, they keep the shopping carts right by the exits. That said, as he was trying to get a cart, a security guard grabbed his arm. He shrugged (sounds familiar) his shoulder and before he knew it, four other men had jumped on him. He tried to explain to them that he had the money and would pay for cans he was carrying. No sale, he gets booked on petty theft. Gotta love it!
There was an older man who also turned himself in as well. He didn't speak much, but I leaned that he was in there for 60 days for child neglect or something. Something along the lines of him not paying child support, or that he owed two thousands dollars. I dunno. I couldn't imagine myself being cooped up in this place for two days. I had hoped this whole process had eaten up a good chunk of my time...
The other guy looked out of it. I asked him what he was in here for, and he didn't here me. I asked again, and yet again he wasn't getting it. The fat guy with his over the top voice asked him and he told us that they arrested him with multiple charges. This guy looked like someone that should be in here. He was in for burglary, assault and battery, possession, and fleeing. his eyes were bloodshot. me and the fat man both let out a "Damn" after he told us everything and then silence filled up the room.
A couple of other people joined us in the small holding cell. No one really said much and time seemed to stand still. I still wasn't even in booking yet and already I wanted out of this place. I was going to go mad in this small place. Maybe a sign of claustrophobia perhaps? In any case soon enough they let us out and led us into the booking area.
Booking is one big party. No really. It's right before you get thrown into a cell. They have phones and a TV and best of all, rubber seats that offer almost no comfort and even bester of yet these chairs aren't really sleep friendly. Hooray! This is where people call there moms, or dads, or whoever and have the embarrassing ordeal of trying to explain to them why they are calling from the county jail. It's quite fun to listen to some of the conversations going on. This time, I didn't have that problem, I was in there for keeps. No phone call was going to get me out. The booking area also had a clock. It was a little past one at this point.
...
FUCK!
Ok, so I get photographed. I tell the guy taking the picture that I am trying to envision this trip as me staying at the shittiest resort ever for a week. I get a chuckle out of him. I'm full of laughs. Jokes on me.
The fingerprint guy was pretty nice. I told him why I was here and he basically told me that I need to be careful because this (I basically, my predicament) is how they get paid. He mentioned something about a law library and me getting this thing off my record completely. I'll be looking into that when I get out.
The new set of people being fingerprinted and photographed are let loose into booking now. They can now use the phone and watch TV. I set myself up in a chair that is right underneath the TV, a few rows back so my neck won't be too uncomfortable. I expect that they will ship me into my cell rather quickly because I turned myself in, there's hardly any reason for me to stay in this room. This room is basically a room for people to use so they can contact someone to bail them out. I try not to look at the clock so much, because that will only drag this ordeal out longer then it has to be.
I calculate in hours how long I will be in this place. I got in at twelve of this very day and won't get out for ten days. With one day of time served, that makes it nine days in this joint. Nine days is next Friday at some point. That's eight full days at worst and half a day. That's two hundred and four hours. It being one (fucking yay) means I only have two hundred and three hours to go! At worst I mean. I don't know when they will let me out, mind you. I just calculated the worst case scenario because that's all I could have counted on.
I just hope that when they do take me to my housing area it's with people with misdemeanors. I'm not built to stay with felons. I'm not an intimidating presence at all. Oh well, can't worry about that now.
The station is TBS. Being a weekday, there's a nonstop run of comedy shows on the channel. That's good at least. It started with Home Improvement. Fair enough. I haven't watched Tool Time in years.
The fat man sits close to me after he got off the phone. After awhile, we started to talk and it turned out that he was on his way to Comic Con in San Diego. Telling me this, I ask if he was a big comic book fan and away we went. I talked to him in a low whisper, but he couldn't seem to contain his enthusiasm about talking comics to someone else. His voice carried all over the booking area. I could hear sneers and jeers from the others who didn't care much for comic gossip. I could care less either, but anything to pass the time.
Who cares if I let out the inner nerd out. No one I knew was going to see me talk about how cool Nightwing is, or how sad we were to be missing opening night of "The Dark Knight." This guy said he wore an actual (well not actual, but you know) green lantern ring. He said Hal Jordan and Superman were his favorite superheroes. He was all about DC. Good man. It was pure losery bliss. Too bad it didn't last. His mom had him out of there by three. Why the fuck wasn't I in a bed yet? Sleep deprivation might have been a bad idea. I was starting to get a headache.
When it hit four they fed us. Two bologna sandwiches and a small carton of juice. Nasty, but I have to eat. Then the cops in the booking area did an pretty dick move. They lowered the volume on the TVs for some reason. Now I couldn't hear the punch lines over the sound of everyone talking and what have you. Not like I am supposed to expect them to adhere to my needs in here, huh?
One thing that was funny, was there was this old black lady who kept talking to her shoes. But, she was talking loud enough so that everyone had to look at her to see if she was talking to them. It got to the point that she became the entertainment for a good while, until a homeless guy got offended at her senile dribble and got up and challenged her. He yelled that this place was his staple ground and he didn't much approve of her getting all the attention while he was in there as well. A shame that the cops put crazy bitch in solitary confinement before anything could happen. I think she could have taken him.
Time went painfully slow. Most shows were just an hour of back to back of the same show. Shows like, "Yes Dear", and "Just Shoot Me," were just some of the things I was trying to watch to make the time fly, but even in my ADD mind, I knew that when a new show came on, only an hour had gone by. I got pissed when they only showed one episode of "Friends" in order to pull three fucking episodes of "Everybody Loves Raymond" out of their ass. Fuck that show.
Did I mention I almost got thrown up on? As I was walking back to my seat from the nasty ass bathroom, some black crack whore bump into me making dry heaving sounds. Ugh, this place disgusts me. I had to backtrack to the bathroom and wash my hands just at the thought of her bumping into me.
At nine I was treated to a nice movie, "Dumb and Dumber." Good movie for a room full of people that got caught doing something stupid. I hadn't seen it in years, and even in its edited form, it was still pretty funny, if not a tad silly. I was in booking long enough to watch that entire flick. It was just around eleven. What the hell man? I had been in booking for over ten hours. Not cool man, not cool at all.
They check my health and weight. That means I'm going in soon. The lady is nice enough, she tells me I am very healthy. I take a guess at my weight and sure enough I got it on the dot. I weigh one hundred and sixty pounds even. Jail, a quick way to lose weight? I guess I would find out if this place was every fat mans dream diet.
11:30pm
They finally call my name. I don't know if I should be happy or not. I go through the process of giving them my clothes in exchange for the orange jumpsuits. They say I can keep my white T-shirt and undershirt since they are plain. They also said I can keep my shoes and socks. The only thing they wanted were my pants. that's all I gave them, but honestly I should have given them everything so I wouldn't have to worry about any of it.
They lead me to my holding cell. The old man who didn't pay to support his kids is going to the same place as me. It's some place called C-block or something. Before getting there, they stop in some bunker of sorts and give us a cup, a toothbrush, and some sandals. Hell yeah, I love sandals. That was the best thing I saw all day. That was why I wished they had taken my shoes.
Inside the C-block they lead us through a whole bunch of locked doors until we get to the cells. They gave us a mat and some linen. I was hoping for single person confinement myself. Not the case. As we walk past the cages, a hearty "Fuck you" and "Fresh Meat" was shouted in our direction followed by less then welcoming laughter. It came from the right cell area. I thought to myself, anywhere but that one, please. Sure enough...that's where they put us.
It was late so most of the people in this particular pod were asleep. the ones that were awake were all in one of the semi-rooms talking or playing something, I don't know. *** I didn't stop to introduce myself. I just hauled ass upstairs as I heard some more laughter comments as I made my way up. I found an open bunk in the second room I looked in. There were two black men already asleep in that room. I tried my best not to bother them as I positioned all my stuff up on the top available bunk. With no pillow and a shitty, skinny, hard mat I laid myself down to go to sleep.
The day had been long. And this was only a half day. This stay was going to suck. I drifted off into dream land rather quickly. Not going to sleep for a day and a half can do that too you.
The first day was over. Eight more....
*** To give you all a better description of the C-block cell I was in, the place didn't have any doors at all. There were bars on the outer parts of the cell farthest from the bunk area. There was also two stories of rooms filled with three bunks each. Two on the ground level and one elevated for a total of three people staying in one area at a time. In between each bunk area was a wall that separated them like a room sort of. There were eight rooms on the top floor and an extra room down below for a total of seventeen rooms altogether. With maximum capacity, that meant I'd be staying with fifty one men for the rest of my stay. On the bottom level to the left of everything was the shower area. In between the bars and the rooms were four tables for eating and what have you. In each room there was a sink and a toilet with a small window that had a view of the outside.
I lie awake in my bed, watching TV and playing games. My hope is that th first day will consist of me sleeping all day long, so I starve myself of rest the entire night in hopes of removing a day of my sentence in slumber. I used to do all nighters all the time, this would be the first one in a LONG time.
The night isn't anything special, I'm just trying to set up the next day...
DAY 1 - Thursday Morning
8:00am
The sun creeps through my windows. I'm still in my bed. I'm waiting for a miracle to happen.
10 days in Jail. Not something I have been looking forward too, but an inevitable outcome of my rash decisions plus the corrupt system at its finest. Now it is something I can't escape. Something that I've been waiting for so it can be over with. Still the image didn't sit well with me, there was nothing I could do at this point.
No miracle.
I get as ready as I can get for something like this. I take a long hot shower. I know it will be the last one I take for a long while. It was a good shower. I eat my last meal as well, cereal.
My job calls. They tell me that the people I had cover for me on Saturday and Sunday won't be able to because they aren't giving out overtime, and those two individuals would have more then 40 hours. They want me to come in because I don't have anyone to cover for me. I pretty much tell them I can't and hang up. At this point my job thinks I am going to Miami for some sort of death in my family. I didn't explain the details, but I told them that much. It will have to suffice for now. I had asked for the next entire week off before they had made that weeks schedule and got lucky.
My calculations had me getting out Friday, or at worst, Saturday morning. I tell my mom I am going to be going on a camping trip. I don't explain much of the details, but she likes to keep tabs on me and wants me to call her every day. I pretty much go under the impression of my phone not getting reception out in nature as the reason why I don't call her. Lame, but it will have to do.
My two alibis are in place. It's 9:30am. I have to be there before 12:00pm. I drive over to my brother's house. He is to drive me over to the Jail. My car will left there. The mood is somber when I arrive. I'm very quiet, completive about the situation. he is unaware of my deep disappointment in him. My friend and myself got next to nothing as far as apologies go from my brother. Now it is I, not him that has to take the brunt of the punishment. He takes me to the jail, it only takes 30 minutes to get there. First, we had to make a stop at the building next door and give them my down payment for staying in jail for these next 10 days. That's right, I had to give them four hundred and twenty five dollars for this whole affair. Cash cow anyone?
It's just after eleven by the time we get out of that place. I curse the system under my breath as I leave. To think I have to give THEM money for me staying locked up is absurd. Sure, it's the fee of the "court cost," but I am losing a week of work for this. It's like I'm losing two weeks of pay instead of just one. Not cool.
The walk to the jail's entrance was long and gloomy. Me and my brother only talked about all the bullshit this whole situation was. Of the three of us, only my friend got out Scott free, (other then having that "no Contest" thing loom on his record.) but I'm glad about that. It's what should have happened to me as well. I guess I'm just not that lucky. But I already knew this.
I get to the desk. What I have in my possession (besides the clothes I am wearing) are my phone, a Gameboy Advance, (for when I get out, I will have something to do while I wait to get picked up) a Sudoku puzzle (level 4 I think) in the hopes that they would at least let me go in with that, my ID, and my yellow wristband. I take no money with me, because if i were to go in with money they would automatically take out ten dollars from whatever I brought with me.
It's just before twelve now and I tell my brother that I will call him when I get out. We exchange a hug. A heartfelt one at that too. Despite all his shortcomings, he is still my brother and I could never turn my back on him. That, something I was very conflicted with during this whole ordeal, is clearer to me now then ever before. He's lucky to have a brother like me. I wonder if he knows that.
He also helps me out with my little "lie" with my mom. He says that he will call her a couple days later and tell her that he got a text from me saying that I wasn't getting any reception while I am supposedly camping. That should ease her mind a little while I stay out of contact with her for 10 days. I just hope she doesn't worry about me too much in the mean time.
It's now twelve o'clock and time for me to go in. I give them my name and they tell me to sit and wait for the officer to usher me into the booking area. The cop comes in and after a few jokes from me, frisks me. He asks if I have any drugs or concealed weapons in my possession. Honestly? He takes everything from within my pockets, and no, my Sudoku wasn't allowed to go in with me. He leads me into a room where I have to give them all of my information. They show me all of the stuff I had in my pocket and after making me describe it all, place it in a bag. I am then asked to go inside a room and strip. That's right, full cavity search time guys! I get to spread my cheeks and lift my sack, literally. Ugh, this is the second time this place has made me do this. I am pretty sure my friend, when we came in a couple months back didn't have to do it back then, but I did....and now again.
Some of the other people waiting in the same room with me don't have to go through this ordeal. Some do. What is the reasoning behind this? That some people have to get naked and some don't. Like I am a threatening presence. This place disgusts me and I will have to deal with it for a week. After they process the few of us that are in that small room, they put us in a small room.
In the room sat three other people. One guy looked nice enough. He was very compliant with the cops and didn't have a sour look on his face. If I could look at myself, I would say I had a blank look on my face. This guy was a heavy set man. He told me that they arrested him while he was in Publix shopping. He had a couple cans of Chef Boyardee, but he needed a shopping cart to continue with his shopping. Now, I've worked at Publix, they keep the shopping carts right by the exits. That said, as he was trying to get a cart, a security guard grabbed his arm. He shrugged (sounds familiar) his shoulder and before he knew it, four other men had jumped on him. He tried to explain to them that he had the money and would pay for cans he was carrying. No sale, he gets booked on petty theft. Gotta love it!
There was an older man who also turned himself in as well. He didn't speak much, but I leaned that he was in there for 60 days for child neglect or something. Something along the lines of him not paying child support, or that he owed two thousands dollars. I dunno. I couldn't imagine myself being cooped up in this place for two days. I had hoped this whole process had eaten up a good chunk of my time...
The other guy looked out of it. I asked him what he was in here for, and he didn't here me. I asked again, and yet again he wasn't getting it. The fat guy with his over the top voice asked him and he told us that they arrested him with multiple charges. This guy looked like someone that should be in here. He was in for burglary, assault and battery, possession, and fleeing. his eyes were bloodshot. me and the fat man both let out a "Damn" after he told us everything and then silence filled up the room.
A couple of other people joined us in the small holding cell. No one really said much and time seemed to stand still. I still wasn't even in booking yet and already I wanted out of this place. I was going to go mad in this small place. Maybe a sign of claustrophobia perhaps? In any case soon enough they let us out and led us into the booking area.
Booking is one big party. No really. It's right before you get thrown into a cell. They have phones and a TV and best of all, rubber seats that offer almost no comfort and even bester of yet these chairs aren't really sleep friendly. Hooray! This is where people call there moms, or dads, or whoever and have the embarrassing ordeal of trying to explain to them why they are calling from the county jail. It's quite fun to listen to some of the conversations going on. This time, I didn't have that problem, I was in there for keeps. No phone call was going to get me out. The booking area also had a clock. It was a little past one at this point.
...
FUCK!
Ok, so I get photographed. I tell the guy taking the picture that I am trying to envision this trip as me staying at the shittiest resort ever for a week. I get a chuckle out of him. I'm full of laughs. Jokes on me.
The fingerprint guy was pretty nice. I told him why I was here and he basically told me that I need to be careful because this (I basically, my predicament) is how they get paid. He mentioned something about a law library and me getting this thing off my record completely. I'll be looking into that when I get out.
The new set of people being fingerprinted and photographed are let loose into booking now. They can now use the phone and watch TV. I set myself up in a chair that is right underneath the TV, a few rows back so my neck won't be too uncomfortable. I expect that they will ship me into my cell rather quickly because I turned myself in, there's hardly any reason for me to stay in this room. This room is basically a room for people to use so they can contact someone to bail them out. I try not to look at the clock so much, because that will only drag this ordeal out longer then it has to be.
I calculate in hours how long I will be in this place. I got in at twelve of this very day and won't get out for ten days. With one day of time served, that makes it nine days in this joint. Nine days is next Friday at some point. That's eight full days at worst and half a day. That's two hundred and four hours. It being one (fucking yay) means I only have two hundred and three hours to go! At worst I mean. I don't know when they will let me out, mind you. I just calculated the worst case scenario because that's all I could have counted on.
I just hope that when they do take me to my housing area it's with people with misdemeanors. I'm not built to stay with felons. I'm not an intimidating presence at all. Oh well, can't worry about that now.
The station is TBS. Being a weekday, there's a nonstop run of comedy shows on the channel. That's good at least. It started with Home Improvement. Fair enough. I haven't watched Tool Time in years.
The fat man sits close to me after he got off the phone. After awhile, we started to talk and it turned out that he was on his way to Comic Con in San Diego. Telling me this, I ask if he was a big comic book fan and away we went. I talked to him in a low whisper, but he couldn't seem to contain his enthusiasm about talking comics to someone else. His voice carried all over the booking area. I could hear sneers and jeers from the others who didn't care much for comic gossip. I could care less either, but anything to pass the time.
Who cares if I let out the inner nerd out. No one I knew was going to see me talk about how cool Nightwing is, or how sad we were to be missing opening night of "The Dark Knight." This guy said he wore an actual (well not actual, but you know) green lantern ring. He said Hal Jordan and Superman were his favorite superheroes. He was all about DC. Good man. It was pure losery bliss. Too bad it didn't last. His mom had him out of there by three. Why the fuck wasn't I in a bed yet? Sleep deprivation might have been a bad idea. I was starting to get a headache.
When it hit four they fed us. Two bologna sandwiches and a small carton of juice. Nasty, but I have to eat. Then the cops in the booking area did an pretty dick move. They lowered the volume on the TVs for some reason. Now I couldn't hear the punch lines over the sound of everyone talking and what have you. Not like I am supposed to expect them to adhere to my needs in here, huh?
One thing that was funny, was there was this old black lady who kept talking to her shoes. But, she was talking loud enough so that everyone had to look at her to see if she was talking to them. It got to the point that she became the entertainment for a good while, until a homeless guy got offended at her senile dribble and got up and challenged her. He yelled that this place was his staple ground and he didn't much approve of her getting all the attention while he was in there as well. A shame that the cops put crazy bitch in solitary confinement before anything could happen. I think she could have taken him.
Time went painfully slow. Most shows were just an hour of back to back of the same show. Shows like, "Yes Dear", and "Just Shoot Me," were just some of the things I was trying to watch to make the time fly, but even in my ADD mind, I knew that when a new show came on, only an hour had gone by. I got pissed when they only showed one episode of "Friends" in order to pull three fucking episodes of "Everybody Loves Raymond" out of their ass. Fuck that show.
Did I mention I almost got thrown up on? As I was walking back to my seat from the nasty ass bathroom, some black crack whore bump into me making dry heaving sounds. Ugh, this place disgusts me. I had to backtrack to the bathroom and wash my hands just at the thought of her bumping into me.
At nine I was treated to a nice movie, "Dumb and Dumber." Good movie for a room full of people that got caught doing something stupid. I hadn't seen it in years, and even in its edited form, it was still pretty funny, if not a tad silly. I was in booking long enough to watch that entire flick. It was just around eleven. What the hell man? I had been in booking for over ten hours. Not cool man, not cool at all.
They check my health and weight. That means I'm going in soon. The lady is nice enough, she tells me I am very healthy. I take a guess at my weight and sure enough I got it on the dot. I weigh one hundred and sixty pounds even. Jail, a quick way to lose weight? I guess I would find out if this place was every fat mans dream diet.
11:30pm
They finally call my name. I don't know if I should be happy or not. I go through the process of giving them my clothes in exchange for the orange jumpsuits. They say I can keep my white T-shirt and undershirt since they are plain. They also said I can keep my shoes and socks. The only thing they wanted were my pants. that's all I gave them, but honestly I should have given them everything so I wouldn't have to worry about any of it.
They lead me to my holding cell. The old man who didn't pay to support his kids is going to the same place as me. It's some place called C-block or something. Before getting there, they stop in some bunker of sorts and give us a cup, a toothbrush, and some sandals. Hell yeah, I love sandals. That was the best thing I saw all day. That was why I wished they had taken my shoes.
Inside the C-block they lead us through a whole bunch of locked doors until we get to the cells. They gave us a mat and some linen. I was hoping for single person confinement myself. Not the case. As we walk past the cages, a hearty "Fuck you" and "Fresh Meat" was shouted in our direction followed by less then welcoming laughter. It came from the right cell area. I thought to myself, anywhere but that one, please. Sure enough...that's where they put us.
It was late so most of the people in this particular pod were asleep. the ones that were awake were all in one of the semi-rooms talking or playing something, I don't know. *** I didn't stop to introduce myself. I just hauled ass upstairs as I heard some more laughter comments as I made my way up. I found an open bunk in the second room I looked in. There were two black men already asleep in that room. I tried my best not to bother them as I positioned all my stuff up on the top available bunk. With no pillow and a shitty, skinny, hard mat I laid myself down to go to sleep.
The day had been long. And this was only a half day. This stay was going to suck. I drifted off into dream land rather quickly. Not going to sleep for a day and a half can do that too you.
The first day was over. Eight more....
*** To give you all a better description of the C-block cell I was in, the place didn't have any doors at all. There were bars on the outer parts of the cell farthest from the bunk area. There was also two stories of rooms filled with three bunks each. Two on the ground level and one elevated for a total of three people staying in one area at a time. In between each bunk area was a wall that separated them like a room sort of. There were eight rooms on the top floor and an extra room down below for a total of seventeen rooms altogether. With maximum capacity, that meant I'd be staying with fifty one men for the rest of my stay. On the bottom level to the left of everything was the shower area. In between the bars and the rooms were four tables for eating and what have you. In each room there was a sink and a toilet with a small window that had a view of the outside.
Family emergency.
On the other side of this, only 4 people know were I am really going.
My two friends who came with me to the courthouse.
My other friend who is going to cover for me at my other job.
and my brother who is going to drive me over there tomorrow morning.
Everyone else in my family thinks I am "going camping."
~
Id rather have my mom pissed off at me for not calling her for a week, then have her worried or scared about my general health.
On the other side of this, only 4 people know were I am really going.
My two friends who came with me to the courthouse.
My other friend who is going to cover for me at my other job.
and my brother who is going to drive me over there tomorrow morning.
Everyone else in my family thinks I am "going camping."
~
Id rather have my mom pissed off at me for not calling her for a week, then have her worried or scared about my general health.
heh
Name of this thread fits just fine.
Final verdict.
A plea of no contest with a 10 day sentence in jail.
My friend got off scott free because he had a clean record. Me? Nope!
My brother got nothing, my friend (glad he got nothing) doesn't have to deal with this no more.
The cop said in his statement that I was kicking and screaming when he laid his hand on me and that I threw a wild punch at him and kept struggling when he had me pinned to the ground.
Because of his statement (which a complete fucking lie) I was going to have 250 days in jail....on a misdemeanor.
My lawyer lowered it to ten days...which is better....but
what the fuck man.
I hate cops.
Name of this thread fits just fine.
Final verdict.
A plea of no contest with a 10 day sentence in jail.
My friend got off scott free because he had a clean record. Me? Nope!
My brother got nothing, my friend (glad he got nothing) doesn't have to deal with this no more.
The cop said in his statement that I was kicking and screaming when he laid his hand on me and that I threw a wild punch at him and kept struggling when he had me pinned to the ground.
Because of his statement (which a complete fucking lie) I was going to have 250 days in jail....on a misdemeanor.
My lawyer lowered it to ten days...which is better....but
what the fuck man.
I hate cops.
Update much?
Ok...
So, like I have t call this whore every Thursday to check in with her and what not. The conversation starts off the same. I give her my address and where I work and she just tells me nothing new has changed with my court date and hearing.
The bitch...before she hangs up decides to throw this in my lap, "Oh, by the way, one of your felony charges got completely dropped and the other was brought down to a misdemeanor. Have a nice day."
The hell? She says it so nonchalantly I almost missed it. The whore, like that wasn't the best news I was going to hear all fucking month. She could have sounded a little more excited. I know I was.
What's it been....3 months of this despair, doubt, and depression? Ugh, all I have to deal with now is this stupid ass VoP shit and I should be free from all this bull shit.
Yay? What a waste of time. I really wish I could do something about the loss of money and trauma this fucking cop caused me for so long. I guess I should just be happy I am "getting off" easy or something.
But yeah, great news for me bitches!
Ok...
So, like I have t call this whore every Thursday to check in with her and what not. The conversation starts off the same. I give her my address and where I work and she just tells me nothing new has changed with my court date and hearing.
The bitch...before she hangs up decides to throw this in my lap, "Oh, by the way, one of your felony charges got completely dropped and the other was brought down to a misdemeanor. Have a nice day."
The hell? She says it so nonchalantly I almost missed it. The whore, like that wasn't the best news I was going to hear all fucking month. She could have sounded a little more excited. I know I was.
What's it been....3 months of this despair, doubt, and depression? Ugh, all I have to deal with now is this stupid ass VoP shit and I should be free from all this bull shit.
Yay? What a waste of time. I really wish I could do something about the loss of money and trauma this fucking cop caused me for so long. I guess I should just be happy I am "getting off" easy or something.
But yeah, great news for me bitches!
I don't care. I want to know what I did to even warrant an arrest?
Talk?
The battery charge is bullshit, and all I need is my lawyer to get the tape and prove me innocent of that.
Other then that, this shit is fucked up.
I did learn a lesson though.
Don't stand up for what's right. The cops just want to fuck up anyones life they can. Friend, family, or just a wrong doing, keep yer mouth shut. You are wrong even if you are right.
Yep.
Talk?
The battery charge is bullshit, and all I need is my lawyer to get the tape and prove me innocent of that.
Other then that, this shit is fucked up.
I did learn a lesson though.
Don't stand up for what's right. The cops just want to fuck up anyones life they can. Friend, family, or just a wrong doing, keep yer mouth shut. You are wrong even if you are right.
Yep.
I wish I got charged with an obstruction of justice charge, but I didn't.
I got a fucking battery charge?
I don't get that. Where did I ever touch a cop in that whole scenario.
The ONLY part of the story I ever got close to a cop was when I pushed my own brother away from the cop before he even got cuffs placed on him.
If I got an obstruction of justice charge, then I could at least understand why the cops arrested me.
but to charge me and then give me a battery charge? Plus along with resisting arrest with violence, (Oh yeah, there was two felonies in this shit hole.) is complete bull shit.
Not to mention my best friend got the same charges and h was about to go into law school. So, as of now both of our futures are on hold.
It sucks.
I hope things get dropped, but the violation of my other probation are looming over my head, and it sucks.
My old case is going t get opened up, and I had like ONE more fucking month until this was done with.
the thing that sucks, is that my dumb ass brother is getting away with hardly anything where me and my friend who were just trying to look out for him are getting the serious shit placed on our records.
Yes, I know my brother completely fucked me. No, I can't look at this and turn my back on him.
I have some stupid brotherly bond with him. Everyone else has turned their back on him, I can't consciously do the same.
I know what i did was stupid, but at the same time, he is my brother. The situation sucked from the get go, I rather knew what was going to happen.
Oh well, if you guys don't see me post for awhile I guess you can assume I am in jail or something. I hope that won't be the case. I will do community service hours, take any class they subject me to take or anything else they might suggest.
That's what I get for being a good brother. How terrible of me.
I got a fucking battery charge?
I don't get that. Where did I ever touch a cop in that whole scenario.
The ONLY part of the story I ever got close to a cop was when I pushed my own brother away from the cop before he even got cuffs placed on him.
If I got an obstruction of justice charge, then I could at least understand why the cops arrested me.
but to charge me and then give me a battery charge? Plus along with resisting arrest with violence, (Oh yeah, there was two felonies in this shit hole.) is complete bull shit.
Not to mention my best friend got the same charges and h was about to go into law school. So, as of now both of our futures are on hold.
It sucks.
I hope things get dropped, but the violation of my other probation are looming over my head, and it sucks.
My old case is going t get opened up, and I had like ONE more fucking month until this was done with.
the thing that sucks, is that my dumb ass brother is getting away with hardly anything where me and my friend who were just trying to look out for him are getting the serious shit placed on our records.
Yes, I know my brother completely fucked me. No, I can't look at this and turn my back on him.
I have some stupid brotherly bond with him. Everyone else has turned their back on him, I can't consciously do the same.
I know what i did was stupid, but at the same time, he is my brother. The situation sucked from the get go, I rather knew what was going to happen.
Oh well, if you guys don't see me post for awhile I guess you can assume I am in jail or something. I hope that won't be the case. I will do community service hours, take any class they subject me to take or anything else they might suggest.
That's what I get for being a good brother. How terrible of me.
Scarface goes to jail
About time, eh?
Maybe even some of you are thinking, hey the fucker deserves it? Nah, you all aren't that big of pricks. heh
~
So, I have a story to tell you. And when I say it isn't doctored I mean it. This is the whole story, so help me God and all that truth implying shit.
~~
Last Thursday night, nearing the end of my Spring Break week, I called up a friend who lives in St. Pete. Now this friend, I won't lie, she is a person I care deeply for. I doubt me and her will ever hook up, but the fact of the matter is, I like hanging out with her despite anything else. She has an uncle, my best friend. She tells me to tell her uncle that we should all go out Thursday night. My friend agrees, and we plan accordingly. I am to be the DD for the night. That's fine. I can do that. heh
My brother calls me. (insert foreshadowing or some gay shit.) He asks me if we are going out tonight. SOMEONE had told him that we were. I really don't know who. It wasn't me, I really don't like going out with him as I usually have to take care of his irresponsible ass.
You see though I am a bit reckless when it comes to things like this I have matured to the point where I don't screw around in public anymore. My brother isn't like that, and every time we go out, he is a liability. (As shown later on in this post.)
So, he tags along with us. Which isn't that big of a deal except it really cost me my ass this time around. We get to this girls house and we all start having a good time playing drinking games and what not. I'm the DD, but eh...the amount of beer I drank would have left my system by the time we had to leave anyways. It wasn't a big deal.
The club scene was nice. This girl brought some of her friends along. Some I had met, some new faces. The crowd meshed pretty well. Nothing went wrong, we all had a nice drunken good time.
Closing time. We all leave. Still no problems. I am outside having a great time taking pictures with girls getting numbers and flirting with drunk people, the usual for me. My brother comes over to me, telling me this, "Yo, you see that guy over there in the red shirt? I don't know why, but I really want to kick his ass."
Me, "Why? What the hell did he do to you?"
"Nothing really, I just really want to beat his ass."
One of the other guys we were with starts to instigate the matter. My brother, now with at least one person supporting him runs off. I think nothing of it and continue with what I was doing prior.
The next thing I hear is some huge co motion from behind me. I see my brother and a cop. The two are in each others faces. WONDERFUL. My brother is spouting off about some stupid shit, drunk as hell and who know what else he was on. He was screaming to this guys face to "ARREST HIM," and asking "WHAT DID I DO?"
Me being the nice and caring brother that I am, goes off and tries to resolve the issue. I apologize to the officer who I don't even think is paying attention to me and get between the two. I push my brother away who is still blabbing stupid drunken nonsense over my shoulder.
My friend is involved too. He is trying to figure out what happened and why there is even a problem, though the one causing this whole scene is my brother, who I can't seem to shut up. It was at this point that the officer had enough. He gets me out of the way and I guess had called for backup. I then see my brother being put in hand cuffs.
It was at this point that emotions started to kick in. none of the cops would answer any of my questions. Me and my friend were just trying to figure out what he had done, because we just wanted to grab him and get home at this point. Wasn't going to happen. I guess the cop got tired of our questions and my brothers blatant disrespect for authority, because he soon pulled out the big guns; his Tazer.
Now, if anyone follows any threads I do make, then you might have read the one about the kid from the University of Florida getting tazed at a John Kerry pep rally. Me and my friend see the tazer and instantly back away. Things don't seem to be getting any better for us, so I go to a near by bench and sit down for a second. With my head in my hands I don't really know what to do at this point. it was then that I hear one of the girls we were with scream something like "Oh my God, or NO!" I look up and now see my best friend getting hand cuffed up. I couldn't tell you why, I still don't know.
I was in tears at this point. There were a good seven cops now and the crowd had grown to a rather large amount. My brother is on the trunk of the cop car, getting his hands placed behind his back. He then looks at me, at my weakest moment and starts screaming in pain and also screaming, "HELP!"
My emotions get the best of me. Call me a dumb ass or whatever. I start yelling, tears clouding my vision. Mind you, I am not cursing the cops out or anything, I just want someone to answer me. I am loud, sure. I was pleading with the cops to please go easy on him, that he was screaming out in pain, and that there was no need to be so rough with him. My voice doesn't lower until one cop looks at me, and whispers something in another cops ear. The said cop turns to look at me and charges me.
He puts his hands on me, and by instinct I flinch. The cop mutters, "Resisting arrest!" and pushes me to the ground. Now I am in in cuffs too. What the fuck.
In the back of the truck me, my friend and my brother are all bewildered at the situation. My brother is still a loud obnoxious mess, my friend is ranting about taking their badges. Me, well...heh. If I told you this was my first ride in one of these things, I'd be lying. I was rather quiet and complacent on the whole situation. It was already too late for any of that.
Long story short, (Well, it is a long story, but the booking and everything isn't really important.) I got charged with 2 (count em) TWO felonies. Battery on a Leo (a cop) and resisting arrest with violence. My friend gets the same charges pretty much and my fucking brother gets a misdemeanor.
WHAT!?
Now, here is where its gets fun for me.
"but Scar, yer clearly not in the wrong, what do you care? This case will get dropped, yada yada yada."
Sure, I don't think they can stick two felonies on me, BUT (and this is a very big but) I was on PTI, which is a form of probation for something stupid I did last year. These charges will re-open up that case and now I could be facing jail time for both situations.
Not only is this going to cost me an arm and a leg to even begin to try and fix, but it's more money that I can afford right now.
I was going to school to become a firefighter, but if any of this shit sticks to my record I can kiss that career out the window.
~
So, really, honestly. All yer problems mean shit to me. This is my future, seemingly ruined...because of what?
WHAT DID I DO?
~
Now, you may reply to this and be like, "You should have known better." Better then what? to speak out? Where is that thing called the freedom of speech now?
I mean, sure I could have said nothing as I witnessed my brother being arrested.
But answer me this, who is a worse person? Someone who watches their sibling going to jail and saying nothing, or someone that sticks up for family?
Is this the America we are living in?
Life is fucked up. I just hope I don't get jail time.
Maybe even some of you are thinking, hey the fucker deserves it? Nah, you all aren't that big of pricks. heh
~
So, I have a story to tell you. And when I say it isn't doctored I mean it. This is the whole story, so help me God and all that truth implying shit.
~~
Last Thursday night, nearing the end of my Spring Break week, I called up a friend who lives in St. Pete. Now this friend, I won't lie, she is a person I care deeply for. I doubt me and her will ever hook up, but the fact of the matter is, I like hanging out with her despite anything else. She has an uncle, my best friend. She tells me to tell her uncle that we should all go out Thursday night. My friend agrees, and we plan accordingly. I am to be the DD for the night. That's fine. I can do that. heh
My brother calls me. (insert foreshadowing or some gay shit.) He asks me if we are going out tonight. SOMEONE had told him that we were. I really don't know who. It wasn't me, I really don't like going out with him as I usually have to take care of his irresponsible ass.
You see though I am a bit reckless when it comes to things like this I have matured to the point where I don't screw around in public anymore. My brother isn't like that, and every time we go out, he is a liability. (As shown later on in this post.)
So, he tags along with us. Which isn't that big of a deal except it really cost me my ass this time around. We get to this girls house and we all start having a good time playing drinking games and what not. I'm the DD, but eh...the amount of beer I drank would have left my system by the time we had to leave anyways. It wasn't a big deal.
The club scene was nice. This girl brought some of her friends along. Some I had met, some new faces. The crowd meshed pretty well. Nothing went wrong, we all had a nice drunken good time.
Closing time. We all leave. Still no problems. I am outside having a great time taking pictures with girls getting numbers and flirting with drunk people, the usual for me. My brother comes over to me, telling me this, "Yo, you see that guy over there in the red shirt? I don't know why, but I really want to kick his ass."
Me, "Why? What the hell did he do to you?"
"Nothing really, I just really want to beat his ass."
One of the other guys we were with starts to instigate the matter. My brother, now with at least one person supporting him runs off. I think nothing of it and continue with what I was doing prior.
The next thing I hear is some huge co motion from behind me. I see my brother and a cop. The two are in each others faces. WONDERFUL. My brother is spouting off about some stupid shit, drunk as hell and who know what else he was on. He was screaming to this guys face to "ARREST HIM," and asking "WHAT DID I DO?"
Me being the nice and caring brother that I am, goes off and tries to resolve the issue. I apologize to the officer who I don't even think is paying attention to me and get between the two. I push my brother away who is still blabbing stupid drunken nonsense over my shoulder.
My friend is involved too. He is trying to figure out what happened and why there is even a problem, though the one causing this whole scene is my brother, who I can't seem to shut up. It was at this point that the officer had enough. He gets me out of the way and I guess had called for backup. I then see my brother being put in hand cuffs.
It was at this point that emotions started to kick in. none of the cops would answer any of my questions. Me and my friend were just trying to figure out what he had done, because we just wanted to grab him and get home at this point. Wasn't going to happen. I guess the cop got tired of our questions and my brothers blatant disrespect for authority, because he soon pulled out the big guns; his Tazer.
Now, if anyone follows any threads I do make, then you might have read the one about the kid from the University of Florida getting tazed at a John Kerry pep rally. Me and my friend see the tazer and instantly back away. Things don't seem to be getting any better for us, so I go to a near by bench and sit down for a second. With my head in my hands I don't really know what to do at this point. it was then that I hear one of the girls we were with scream something like "Oh my God, or NO!" I look up and now see my best friend getting hand cuffed up. I couldn't tell you why, I still don't know.
I was in tears at this point. There were a good seven cops now and the crowd had grown to a rather large amount. My brother is on the trunk of the cop car, getting his hands placed behind his back. He then looks at me, at my weakest moment and starts screaming in pain and also screaming, "HELP!"
My emotions get the best of me. Call me a dumb ass or whatever. I start yelling, tears clouding my vision. Mind you, I am not cursing the cops out or anything, I just want someone to answer me. I am loud, sure. I was pleading with the cops to please go easy on him, that he was screaming out in pain, and that there was no need to be so rough with him. My voice doesn't lower until one cop looks at me, and whispers something in another cops ear. The said cop turns to look at me and charges me.
He puts his hands on me, and by instinct I flinch. The cop mutters, "Resisting arrest!" and pushes me to the ground. Now I am in in cuffs too. What the fuck.
In the back of the truck me, my friend and my brother are all bewildered at the situation. My brother is still a loud obnoxious mess, my friend is ranting about taking their badges. Me, well...heh. If I told you this was my first ride in one of these things, I'd be lying. I was rather quiet and complacent on the whole situation. It was already too late for any of that.
Long story short, (Well, it is a long story, but the booking and everything isn't really important.) I got charged with 2 (count em) TWO felonies. Battery on a Leo (a cop) and resisting arrest with violence. My friend gets the same charges pretty much and my fucking brother gets a misdemeanor.
WHAT!?
Now, here is where its gets fun for me.
"but Scar, yer clearly not in the wrong, what do you care? This case will get dropped, yada yada yada."
Sure, I don't think they can stick two felonies on me, BUT (and this is a very big but) I was on PTI, which is a form of probation for something stupid I did last year. These charges will re-open up that case and now I could be facing jail time for both situations.
Not only is this going to cost me an arm and a leg to even begin to try and fix, but it's more money that I can afford right now.
I was going to school to become a firefighter, but if any of this shit sticks to my record I can kiss that career out the window.
~
So, really, honestly. All yer problems mean shit to me. This is my future, seemingly ruined...because of what?
WHAT DID I DO?
~
Now, you may reply to this and be like, "You should have known better." Better then what? to speak out? Where is that thing called the freedom of speech now?
I mean, sure I could have said nothing as I witnessed my brother being arrested.
But answer me this, who is a worse person? Someone who watches their sibling going to jail and saying nothing, or someone that sticks up for family?
Is this the America we are living in?
Life is fucked up. I just hope I don't get jail time.
Saturday, May 14, 2011
Sing a Song
Just imagine my angelic voice singing this to you.
~
Carry on my wayward son
There'll be peace when you are done
Lay your weary head to rest
Don't you cry no more
Once I rose above the noise and confusion
Just to get a glimpse beyond this illusion
I was soaring ever higher
But I flew too high
Though my eyes could see I still was a blind man
Though my mind could think I still was a mad man
I hear the voices when I'm dreaming
I can hear them say
Masquerading as a man with a reason
My charade is the event of the season
And if I claim to be a wise man, well
It surely means that I don't know
On a stormy sea of moving emotion
Tossed about I'm like a ship on the ocean
I set a course for winds of fortune
But I hear the voices say
No!
Carry on, you will always remember
Carry on, nothing equals the splendor
The center lights around your vanity
But surely heaven waits for you
Carry on my wayward son
There'll be peace when you are done
Lay your weary head to rest
Don't you cry (don't you cry no more)
...Ah Kansas. Oh boy, so what else is new. Other then me writing to a jabroni like you all the time, not much! Ricky and Brandon from the PC wanted to give a shout out to you. Holla!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Other PC news? Well I dunno if I told you but Adrian, the big Jessica chick and Jose are all gone now. Jose is engaged and in Gainesville. I have no idea where the other two ho bags went. I mean Jessica was cool, but Adrian was annoying as all hell. Glad she won't come around and ask me to tell you to give her some money. What a dumb beotch. lol
Also what the hell do you want me to contact Mike Holley for anyways? And what is up with that treasure map you call directions? lol Am I supposed to just knock on some door and hope that Mike Holley answers the door let alone remembers who I am? lol Isn't he all cracked out or something? Ryan don't play that shit mang!
As far as the Bucs draft? I think they did great. They twerked on the middle of their defensive line last draft and now worked on the outside pass rush. These two boy they got Clayborn and Bowers are beasts. Expect the Bucs D line to be very good next year. They also got a good TE and LB in the draft too, as well as Ahmad Black from Florida.
HOW BOUT THEM HEAT! 8 more wins until immortality! Them Celtics didn't know what hit em! BOO YA! The Heat must have Diddy as a motivational speaker or something. CAN'T STOP WON'T STOP. EH EH! EH EH! Wade and James are not Batman and Robin. They are Batman and Flash! I think Dc comics needs to make a new comic line just because of those two guys. IT COULD HAPPEN!
Speaking of comics, I saw Thor the other day too. That movie was the beez neez! BY ODIN'S BEARD! And of course Sam Jackson was in it as well. why? BECAUSE HE'S MOTHER FUCKING SAM JACKSON!
I miss ya dawg. Get out soon or something. Tell me something positive about you getting out please!
Let's see what I can come up with as far as pictures. Here's one just for you and the guys in prison. Nothing but DICKS!
Focker. Out!
~
Carry on my wayward son
There'll be peace when you are done
Lay your weary head to rest
Don't you cry no more
Once I rose above the noise and confusion
Just to get a glimpse beyond this illusion
I was soaring ever higher
But I flew too high
Though my eyes could see I still was a blind man
Though my mind could think I still was a mad man
I hear the voices when I'm dreaming
I can hear them say
Masquerading as a man with a reason
My charade is the event of the season
And if I claim to be a wise man, well
It surely means that I don't know
On a stormy sea of moving emotion
Tossed about I'm like a ship on the ocean
I set a course for winds of fortune
But I hear the voices say
No!
Carry on, you will always remember
Carry on, nothing equals the splendor
The center lights around your vanity
But surely heaven waits for you
Carry on my wayward son
There'll be peace when you are done
Lay your weary head to rest
Don't you cry (don't you cry no more)
...Ah Kansas. Oh boy, so what else is new. Other then me writing to a jabroni like you all the time, not much! Ricky and Brandon from the PC wanted to give a shout out to you. Holla!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Other PC news? Well I dunno if I told you but Adrian, the big Jessica chick and Jose are all gone now. Jose is engaged and in Gainesville. I have no idea where the other two ho bags went. I mean Jessica was cool, but Adrian was annoying as all hell. Glad she won't come around and ask me to tell you to give her some money. What a dumb beotch. lol
Also what the hell do you want me to contact Mike Holley for anyways? And what is up with that treasure map you call directions? lol Am I supposed to just knock on some door and hope that Mike Holley answers the door let alone remembers who I am? lol Isn't he all cracked out or something? Ryan don't play that shit mang!
As far as the Bucs draft? I think they did great. They twerked on the middle of their defensive line last draft and now worked on the outside pass rush. These two boy they got Clayborn and Bowers are beasts. Expect the Bucs D line to be very good next year. They also got a good TE and LB in the draft too, as well as Ahmad Black from Florida.
HOW BOUT THEM HEAT! 8 more wins until immortality! Them Celtics didn't know what hit em! BOO YA! The Heat must have Diddy as a motivational speaker or something. CAN'T STOP WON'T STOP. EH EH! EH EH! Wade and James are not Batman and Robin. They are Batman and Flash! I think Dc comics needs to make a new comic line just because of those two guys. IT COULD HAPPEN!
Speaking of comics, I saw Thor the other day too. That movie was the beez neez! BY ODIN'S BEARD! And of course Sam Jackson was in it as well. why? BECAUSE HE'S MOTHER FUCKING SAM JACKSON!
I miss ya dawg. Get out soon or something. Tell me something positive about you getting out please!
Let's see what I can come up with as far as pictures. Here's one just for you and the guys in prison. Nothing but DICKS!
Focker. Out!
Thursday, March 31, 2011
Wadddup!
Yo so it sucks that you have been locked away for so long. It seems like an eternity has passed since we have hung out together. This shit is so whack! I mean damn! They move you around like you aren't even a human. America is really fucked up. I still to this day don't think you did anything bad enough to warrant this. I mean if you did they should have locked you up when you committed the crime, not when you were already serving the punishment for the acts.
But whatever. Fuck the ICE! I hate ice. It makes my teeth cold and shit! How you been holding up Mr. Lee? they move you around too much to get too comfortable I imagine. At least you are getting fed better. Also what pictures are you talking about? Where can I go to see yer punk ass long hair?
Did you hear about Mr. Aqib Talib? Is e yer new bunk mate? lol What a dumb ass. I swear right when I think the Bucs are about to make that next step into greatness one of our guys runs into a pole or shoots someone or smacks a taxi driver or beats his wife or smokes a joint in front of Roger Goodell. LOL These guys are moronic, na meen? The Bucs were also the front runner for that HBO show Hard Knocks. The Jets were the team last year, but fuck NY so I never bothered watching the show.
Yeah, Steve and Andrea got married this past Saturday. It was a nice reception and all, and yeah, you were missed. Diana was walking around with some new guy. He seemed ok. He did my eyebrows and facial hair to make me look like Tony Stark son! I was sexing everybody up. And by sexing, I mean I was drunk off my ass. lol I was so drunk when we went bar hopping after the wedding I went to the bathroom and walked into the women's bathroom on accident. I was like, "The fuck are all you ladies doing in here?" lol
Danny was a mess also. They told us that Steve did not want anyone taking off their shirts at all. So guess what Danny does. He rips his shirt off and just starts wearing his vest. He looked straight up like Aladdin! A WHOLE NEW WORLD!!!!!!!!! He then started ripping off my clothes so I could match his dumb ass. He even ripped my wife beater too. And here I thought it would be women tearing my clothes off. lol
Aldo, last night was Amanda's 21st birthday. She got crazy drunk. lol I had to take care of her the entire night. It was kinda cute. I never seen her get that bad before. I doubt she will ever do that again. lol We went to Kobes and did some SAKE BOMBS. lol I thought of you when we did them because of that dumb ass video you showed me that one day at Mike's GFs house. lol Remember that? He told me to grab her ass. LOL Good times. Tequila BOMB!
Ive been job hunting recently. I can't get a good job for the life of me. I really just want some sort of secondary job that gets me more hours. The PC is great, but I really need more then two days. When I do get a job, me and Amanda are going to move in together. So, I really want to speed up that process.
Get this! I got this call from a weird 904 number, and I thought it was you. Turns out it was those bastards from Sallie Mae! ARGH! Damn you Andy-son!
Other then that, I've been blogging a lot. This letter is actually part of my blog site. I write about random stuff, but I have a lot of different blogs for different topics. Sports and stuff like that are my main hobbies. Hopefully I can turn that into something of a profession. We shall see. We shall see.
Damn man. I guess that's it for now. This is really dumb. Stay healthy man. Stay positive. Stay black! Black actors, Bla bla bla! It's che boi! Holla!
Yo so it sucks that you have been locked away for so long. It seems like an eternity has passed since we have hung out together. This shit is so whack! I mean damn! They move you around like you aren't even a human. America is really fucked up. I still to this day don't think you did anything bad enough to warrant this. I mean if you did they should have locked you up when you committed the crime, not when you were already serving the punishment for the acts.
But whatever. Fuck the ICE! I hate ice. It makes my teeth cold and shit! How you been holding up Mr. Lee? they move you around too much to get too comfortable I imagine. At least you are getting fed better. Also what pictures are you talking about? Where can I go to see yer punk ass long hair?
Did you hear about Mr. Aqib Talib? Is e yer new bunk mate? lol What a dumb ass. I swear right when I think the Bucs are about to make that next step into greatness one of our guys runs into a pole or shoots someone or smacks a taxi driver or beats his wife or smokes a joint in front of Roger Goodell. LOL These guys are moronic, na meen? The Bucs were also the front runner for that HBO show Hard Knocks. The Jets were the team last year, but fuck NY so I never bothered watching the show.
Yeah, Steve and Andrea got married this past Saturday. It was a nice reception and all, and yeah, you were missed. Diana was walking around with some new guy. He seemed ok. He did my eyebrows and facial hair to make me look like Tony Stark son! I was sexing everybody up. And by sexing, I mean I was drunk off my ass. lol I was so drunk when we went bar hopping after the wedding I went to the bathroom and walked into the women's bathroom on accident. I was like, "The fuck are all you ladies doing in here?" lol
Danny was a mess also. They told us that Steve did not want anyone taking off their shirts at all. So guess what Danny does. He rips his shirt off and just starts wearing his vest. He looked straight up like Aladdin! A WHOLE NEW WORLD!!!!!!!!! He then started ripping off my clothes so I could match his dumb ass. He even ripped my wife beater too. And here I thought it would be women tearing my clothes off. lol
Aldo, last night was Amanda's 21st birthday. She got crazy drunk. lol I had to take care of her the entire night. It was kinda cute. I never seen her get that bad before. I doubt she will ever do that again. lol We went to Kobes and did some SAKE BOMBS. lol I thought of you when we did them because of that dumb ass video you showed me that one day at Mike's GFs house. lol Remember that? He told me to grab her ass. LOL Good times. Tequila BOMB!
Ive been job hunting recently. I can't get a good job for the life of me. I really just want some sort of secondary job that gets me more hours. The PC is great, but I really need more then two days. When I do get a job, me and Amanda are going to move in together. So, I really want to speed up that process.
Get this! I got this call from a weird 904 number, and I thought it was you. Turns out it was those bastards from Sallie Mae! ARGH! Damn you Andy-son!
Other then that, I've been blogging a lot. This letter is actually part of my blog site. I write about random stuff, but I have a lot of different blogs for different topics. Sports and stuff like that are my main hobbies. Hopefully I can turn that into something of a profession. We shall see. We shall see.
Damn man. I guess that's it for now. This is really dumb. Stay healthy man. Stay positive. Stay black! Black actors, Bla bla bla! It's che boi! Holla!
Saturday, January 22, 2011
New Years
Happy New Year motha fuckah!
Sorry for the delay. I sent ya a letter like two months ago, but when you moved they sent it right back to my arse. So, this time you will be getting two letters from me, huzzah! So what's up man. Hope you don't move again, or you will be getting three letters five months from now! Actually, I hope you do move out of that hell hole and back to Tampa. geez, hurry up already foo. yer gonna miss fantasy football if you stay in there too long. I'll tell you my secret weapon for next years draft.
Connor Barth. Dude is gonna kill it. Just you watch sukka!
Anyways, how ya been? I have some crazy news for ya. Are you ready for this? Amanda is pregnant. Dude, I have no idea what to do! I can't be a daddy I don't know how to change diapers. I hope my kid likes Smash Bros and Final Fantasy. lol But seriously, she told me a couple of weeks ago and I haven't told my parents yet. Not sure how my mom is going to like this news. I bet she flips the fuck out. I'm kinda freaking out now too, and now I'm looking for a second job again. Shits gonna be crazy around here for me now. I better think of a bad ass name. I was thinking Maximilian. What do you think?
Er, yeah...that. I won in one of my fantasy football leagues. Out of 5 I only won one. And it wasn't even a money league! Shit! Funny thing, the team I won with had the worst record out of all my teams. Crazy!
Bucs went 10-6...just like I predicted...whaaaat! I told you. No one wanted to believe me. Everyone thought I was crazy, you all doubted me. Now look at me, I was right. *dances* Oh yeah, oh yeah! Can ya dig that sukka! BOO YA!
I just watched Takers last night. It was a lot better then what I thought it was gonna be, but still nothing to write about. Oh snap, I'm writing about it right NOW. OMG! I also saw the Green hornet, and the new Bruce Lee guy had some bad ass fight scenes. The did Seth Rogen right. He had his moment to be a bad ass, but messes up at the very end. It seemed appropriate, and funny. The movie was pretty cool. You seen any movies in thar?
I heard that you were growing out yer hair. ME TOO! High five! My hair looks kinda ridiculous right now. I'm not gonna cut it until Steve's wedding.
Man this one minute conversation stuff is bullsheet mang! Why can't I talk to you longer? It's stupid.
Dude I saw the craziest shit the other day. I was at Gonzalo's house and his mom came in and started snooping around. Gomez flipped the fuck out. I mean, dude went clinically insane for a little bit. He had a huge temper tantrum and picked up his and tried to throw her out of the house. He started punching the wall and shit. I was like...uh can we keep playing NBA 2k11 now? Dude seriously needs to take some anger management classes. lol Chill out.
lol So yeah, NBA2k11 is awesome. Jordan is so bad ass. Me and Gomez did a fantasy draft where we could draft old and new school players to the teams in the playoffs. I sucked but somehow the only team I advanced with managed to win everything. My Magic team was dope. Check this squad out. Melo, Blake Griffin, John Stockton, Moses Malone, and Vince Carter were my starters. Off my bench I had Nate Robinson, John Childress, Jon Starks, Rip, and some other guys. Team was sick nasty!
So I'm heading to Burning Tree's CD release party tonight! They are finally getting a Cd out there. It's gonna be epic. I get a free copy for eight bucks entrance, but Elgin said he might get us in for free. So we shall see! Next week is Gasparilla. That should be fun. If I get off....
So Packers, Steelers Superbowl? Or Anyone other then the Jets. Fuck Mark Sanchez. Fuck Rex Ryan. Fuck Brett Favre and his real comfortable dick jeans. Fuck airplanes and anything green too! A Rod baby. I've been on his junk forever now. And finally people are starting to see his greatness. I saw it all along. Don't sleep on Josh freeman either. Dude is sick nasty also. Now all I need is Cam Newton to go to the Dolphins and I will be set. Man the Dolphins suck! What the hell. It's like all the dumb ass Tampa executives who used to make all those shitty moves for the Bucs in the old days retired ad moved down south only to fuck up Miami's team like they did with Tampa. Fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuc.
Dude, the Heat are killing it. I still find it hard to imagine Lebron and Wade on the same team. Not in a million fantasy drafts would you ever be able to assemble that team. How the hell did Pat Riley make that happen? He is a diabolical genius. I love it! Man, the Internet sure loves to hate on the Heat. I found this website, it's fucking hysterical. It's called mrslebronwade.com. lol The premise is Lebron is the bitch in the relationship because he went to Wade's team, right? So the website has all these pictures with hot ass chicks, except the have Lebrons face. LOL It's fucking crazy. There are some where they will have a chick and a dude holding each other and throw in Wade and Lebron's face in the image. It's some funny shit. What's even more funny is that they went even further in the parody with Wade and Lebron having a kid and that kid being baby Bosh. LOL So they have all these baby pictures with Chris Bosh's big ass head superimposed in them. It's freaking hilarious. lol Good times.
So anyways man. I miss ya. You need to lock it up and get back over here already. I hope everything goes your way and I pray that you come back to us. You know we miss you. Love ya man. And oh, by the way I was totally joshing you about the pregnancy thing. Amanda is not pregnant...I hope. lol Got ya bitch!
Heart, Ryan
Sorry for the delay. I sent ya a letter like two months ago, but when you moved they sent it right back to my arse. So, this time you will be getting two letters from me, huzzah! So what's up man. Hope you don't move again, or you will be getting three letters five months from now! Actually, I hope you do move out of that hell hole and back to Tampa. geez, hurry up already foo. yer gonna miss fantasy football if you stay in there too long. I'll tell you my secret weapon for next years draft.
Connor Barth. Dude is gonna kill it. Just you watch sukka!
Anyways, how ya been? I have some crazy news for ya. Are you ready for this? Amanda is pregnant. Dude, I have no idea what to do! I can't be a daddy I don't know how to change diapers. I hope my kid likes Smash Bros and Final Fantasy. lol But seriously, she told me a couple of weeks ago and I haven't told my parents yet. Not sure how my mom is going to like this news. I bet she flips the fuck out. I'm kinda freaking out now too, and now I'm looking for a second job again. Shits gonna be crazy around here for me now. I better think of a bad ass name. I was thinking Maximilian. What do you think?
Er, yeah...that. I won in one of my fantasy football leagues. Out of 5 I only won one. And it wasn't even a money league! Shit! Funny thing, the team I won with had the worst record out of all my teams. Crazy!
Bucs went 10-6...just like I predicted...whaaaat! I told you. No one wanted to believe me. Everyone thought I was crazy, you all doubted me. Now look at me, I was right. *dances* Oh yeah, oh yeah! Can ya dig that sukka! BOO YA!
I just watched Takers last night. It was a lot better then what I thought it was gonna be, but still nothing to write about. Oh snap, I'm writing about it right NOW. OMG! I also saw the Green hornet, and the new Bruce Lee guy had some bad ass fight scenes. The did Seth Rogen right. He had his moment to be a bad ass, but messes up at the very end. It seemed appropriate, and funny. The movie was pretty cool. You seen any movies in thar?
I heard that you were growing out yer hair. ME TOO! High five! My hair looks kinda ridiculous right now. I'm not gonna cut it until Steve's wedding.
Man this one minute conversation stuff is bullsheet mang! Why can't I talk to you longer? It's stupid.
Dude I saw the craziest shit the other day. I was at Gonzalo's house and his mom came in and started snooping around. Gomez flipped the fuck out. I mean, dude went clinically insane for a little bit. He had a huge temper tantrum and picked up his and tried to throw her out of the house. He started punching the wall and shit. I was like...uh can we keep playing NBA 2k11 now? Dude seriously needs to take some anger management classes. lol Chill out.
lol So yeah, NBA2k11 is awesome. Jordan is so bad ass. Me and Gomez did a fantasy draft where we could draft old and new school players to the teams in the playoffs. I sucked but somehow the only team I advanced with managed to win everything. My Magic team was dope. Check this squad out. Melo, Blake Griffin, John Stockton, Moses Malone, and Vince Carter were my starters. Off my bench I had Nate Robinson, John Childress, Jon Starks, Rip, and some other guys. Team was sick nasty!
So I'm heading to Burning Tree's CD release party tonight! They are finally getting a Cd out there. It's gonna be epic. I get a free copy for eight bucks entrance, but Elgin said he might get us in for free. So we shall see! Next week is Gasparilla. That should be fun. If I get off....
So Packers, Steelers Superbowl? Or Anyone other then the Jets. Fuck Mark Sanchez. Fuck Rex Ryan. Fuck Brett Favre and his real comfortable dick jeans. Fuck airplanes and anything green too! A Rod baby. I've been on his junk forever now. And finally people are starting to see his greatness. I saw it all along. Don't sleep on Josh freeman either. Dude is sick nasty also. Now all I need is Cam Newton to go to the Dolphins and I will be set. Man the Dolphins suck! What the hell. It's like all the dumb ass Tampa executives who used to make all those shitty moves for the Bucs in the old days retired ad moved down south only to fuck up Miami's team like they did with Tampa. Fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuc.
Dude, the Heat are killing it. I still find it hard to imagine Lebron and Wade on the same team. Not in a million fantasy drafts would you ever be able to assemble that team. How the hell did Pat Riley make that happen? He is a diabolical genius. I love it! Man, the Internet sure loves to hate on the Heat. I found this website, it's fucking hysterical. It's called mrslebronwade.com. lol The premise is Lebron is the bitch in the relationship because he went to Wade's team, right? So the website has all these pictures with hot ass chicks, except the have Lebrons face. LOL It's fucking crazy. There are some where they will have a chick and a dude holding each other and throw in Wade and Lebron's face in the image. It's some funny shit. What's even more funny is that they went even further in the parody with Wade and Lebron having a kid and that kid being baby Bosh. LOL So they have all these baby pictures with Chris Bosh's big ass head superimposed in them. It's freaking hilarious. lol Good times.
So anyways man. I miss ya. You need to lock it up and get back over here already. I hope everything goes your way and I pray that you come back to us. You know we miss you. Love ya man. And oh, by the way I was totally joshing you about the pregnancy thing. Amanda is not pregnant...I hope. lol Got ya bitch!
Heart, Ryan
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